


Forbidden

by kenken_chan (mikasassqueen), mikasassqueen



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: F/M, High School AU, Mikasa Ackerman/Jean Kirstein - Freeform, Minor Armin Arlert/Annie Leonhart, Minor Sasha Blouse/Connie Springer, One-Sided Levi/Petra Ral, One-Sided Mikasa Ackerman/Eren Yeager, Student!Mikasa, Teacher x Student AU, teacher!levi
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-07-22
Updated: 2016-09-17
Packaged: 2018-02-09 23:15:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 27,363
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2001777
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mikasassqueen/pseuds/kenken_chan, https://archiveofourown.org/users/mikasassqueen/pseuds/mikasassqueen
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When the only person her heart ever beat for shuts her down, Mikasa finds a stray ray of hope in the eyes of the person she least expected to hold her hand and guide her through the dark path, showing her a whole new world, and a bigger purpose in life. And only when her heart starts beating for that person she realizes; she’s fallen in forbidden love.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> Long time ago, I wrote this for the second RivaMika week and haven't updated it. Now I'm gonna work on it again. Here's the prologue, chapter 1 should be up soon.

 

* * *

**_ FORBIDDEN _ **

* * *

** Prologue **

_"Mikasa, there's something I want to tell you."_

Her eyes wouldn't look at his face the same way again. Her heart wouldn't beat for him anymore. And her ears couldn't deny the words she heard coming from him. And if her heartbeats were to be heard, he could have listened to the saddest music that a broken heart had ever played.

_"I…"_

She could still hold on to the string of hope. It still wasn't cut as long as he hadn't said it yet. She could still wish for him to say the words she'd been longing for him to say.

_"I have…I have feelings for Annie."_

She could no longer hope, dream, or wish. Her fears had always been real; she was never wrong. She saw everything with her own eyes; she saw the way he looked at  _her_ , the way his face would flush whenever she passed by, the way he'd talk to her. She saw  _everything_ , and knew very well, they were not meant to be.

_"I was wondering if you could…talk to her for me."_

_Why me?_ She wanted to ask.  _Why me, Eren?_ Her lips parted, but nothing could be heard.  _You really have no idea…_  She looked at him, seeking for an answer to the unspoken questions in her eyes.  _How much I love you - always did…?_ She needed to cry, but not in his presence. She would never let him see how far he had broken her heart.  _How can you ask me…to help you get with another girl, when my heart was only beating for you? Are you really…are you really that **blind**?_

_"Of course, as long as it doesn't bother you…So, what do you say?"_

_No. I can't, because I love you._ "Okay." She buried her sadness within her heart and forced the word out of her mouth, swallowing the urge to tell him her true feelings, to let him know how mistaken he was; asking her such a thing. But she knew, she knew Eren too well; he would never be able to look at her the same way, and there was no way she would risk the only right she had left with him, the only source of satisfaction she would ever get from him.

* * *

She couldn't go back home that day, not with him. Her legs failed to carry her out of the high school grounds and she used the wall for support to lean her back against it, her nails scratching its hardness. And just as if heavens could hear the sound of her heart falling apart and scattering into unfixable pieces, a couple of raindrops began to fall to partner her loneliness, and she let her tears finally out, mixing with a raindrop while rolling along her cheek .

Her hair and uniform were fully drenched when she came to observe the figure that stood in front of her, holding an umbrella above her head and sheltering her from the rain. Of all people, it was the one she despised the most, her math teacher. The grumpiest teachers she had ever seen, and whom she never liked since the first meeting. He, of all teachers who could have found her, of all people who had passed by and saw her, was the only one who approached her.  _Why?_

"If you don't have an umbrella, have mine. You'll get sick if you stay under the rain, go home." The older man spoke and she raised her head to stare at him. "Are you waiting for someone?" He asked, but she didn't answer. She was rather lost in thoughts, mixed thoughts, so many questions to even give an answer to the others.  _Why is he offering me his umbrella? Why is he acting nice to me out of a sudden?_ "Do you need a drive, Mikasa?"  _Why did he call me by my name?_

And just with the rain fall, her eyes were washed and opened to a new sight she never saw in him. The image of the grumpy, nonchalant teacher she drew of him in her head and stuck into her mind were no longer there. They fell along with the fantasies she had built about Eren, all at once in one day.

She just realized that life never looked the same when painted with the truth she'd been blinded from. Life was never the same way she saw it before. And beyond all those lies she'd been forcing on herself, she was broken since a very long time, and just now she realized it.

Her hand brushed against the man's when taking the umbrella from his hand, and just then, she felt the warmth he'd been keeping from everyone. Behind the mask he always wore, he was gentle. And just like she would never look at Eren the same way, she also knew that she could no longer look at  _him_ the same way, Mr. Levi; her most hated teacher, was now a wholly new person in her eyes.

* * *


	2. Chapter I: Tenderness

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yoo! I know some of you have been waiting for this for a while now. Sorry for not posting the first chapter earlier. I was having a writers block. Anyway, here is the first chapter. Hope you'll enjoy it. 
> 
> I also feel the need to say after the confirmation of Levi's age to be 30+. I never really saw a problem with the age gap between Levi and Mikasa in the first place, and I will clarify that in this fanfic he's going to be 36, while Mikasa is 16. Just wanted to let you know in case you don't feel comfortable with age-gap relationships. It's going to be a teacher x student fic, so it isn't really surprising either.

 

* * *

 **_FORBIDDEN_ ** _[  
](http://heroes-comeback.tumblr.com/post/92527734007/forbidden-multichapter-high-school-au) _

* * *

**Chapter I:** _Tenderness_

"Mikasa!"

There was a familiar, soft voice calling her out of her absent-mindedness. Her best friend, Armin, spotted her sitting alone, looking lost and demoralized. Concerned, he broke through her loneliness and approached her, taking a seat by her side.

"Aren’t you going back to class?" He asked.

"I will—in a bit." Her eyes didn’t meet his, and he figured out something was wrong after hearing her tone.

"Eren…" He spoke, and he saw the way her eyes opened slightly wider at the mention of Eren’s name. "He told you, didn’t he?"  _He knew?_  ”…About Annie.”  _He knew_ , “He’s such an idiot. He shouldn’t have told you, but I guess…it’s helpless, isn’t it? Eren has always been an idiot.” He placed his hands on each side of the seat, straightening his back and looking up. “You knew even before he tells you. So please, Mikasa, don’t be upset.”

"He—He asked me to…help him get with her." She finally spoke her pain out, revealing to her dear friend the thing that hurt her the most: being asked to help the boy she loved to get with another girl. And she  _agreed_  to.

"Oh? And what did you tell him?" He frowned, his disappointment in Eren reaching higher.

"I can’t say ‘no’ to him, Armin." She wanted but she couldn’t. Never could she refuse doing something for Eren, even If it was causing her to be broken.

"You should, though. Mikasa, Eren has no idea what you’re going through. You shouldn’t be suffering for his sake." His eyes landed on her again, narrowing in irritation for having two friends, each is dumber than the other.

"No. It doesn’t matter. As long as Eren is happy, I am happy." There was a sad smile tugging on her lips for a second before vanishing and drawing a frown instead.

"Wrong. So wrong! Your happiness doesn’t depend on Eren’s. Your happiness depends on you, Mikasa." Armin shot a glare over at his friend, his tone rising in a sharp voice, "You live for your own, not for others. People aren’t going to be happy for your sake. If they’re happy, it’s for them. Be a little selfish and search for  _your_ happiness, Mikasa.” Armin placed his hand over Mikasa’s, patting it comfortingly.

"I can’t just get rid of feelings I’ve been having for him since a long time—"

"Someone who can’t throw something important away, can never hope to change anything, Mikasa."

Mikasa at last met his eyes with hers, wide open. She stared into them, building up his words in her head, and finally asked, “You’re hurt, too, aren’t you?”

"Huh?" He was a bit surprised by her question, but quickly turned his gaze away from her.

"I know you like Annie." She added, turning her hand and squeezing her friend’s, "Or else, you wouldn’t understand how I feel."

"Just like you, I knew Annie liked Eren. I knew he liked her, too, which is why I didn’t say anything." He admitted, tightening his hold around the girl’s hand. "I’m not asking you to confess your feelings to him. I’m asking you to cheer up. Don’t let this put you down. This is life, you don’t get what you want, but you shouldn’t give up."

"I—I don’t know. Eren has always been the only one in my life—I can’t just let him go."

"You can if you want to." He squeezed her hand. "You can, Mikasa. You can let your feelings for him go. He doesn’t deserve them, and you know it." He chuckled. "He can still be your family, like he always has been."

"Armin—I can’t."

"Don’t be a downer, Mikasa. You’re not in this alone. Eren is my friend, too. We’ve been friends even before you meet him, and yet he couldn’t figure out I had feelings for the girl he liked, nor could he see that he was hurting his best friend. If anything, _I_  should be upset, not you. But I’m not, because I know Eren very well. You know him, too, so don’t tell me you weren’t expecting this.”

"I knew, but I wasn’t ready."

"A soldier is always ready, Mikasa. Sure, they don’t know when the enemy is going to attack, but they’re expecting to be attacked either way. And whenever that happens, they’re going to give it their best shot and fight. You were expecting this, it happened and now you should face it instead of waving your white flag and declaring withdrawal."

She kept silent, and he sighed.

"Not being ready is  _not_ an excuse, Mikasa. Life isn’t going to ask you, ‘Hey! Are you up for some very bad news? I’m going put you through some serious shit and make you miserable, but it’s okay if you’re not ready. We can wait.’” He tried to keep a sarcastic tone while saying that, attempting to make her smile at least.

She managed to laugh a bit at his words.

"Now get up. We’re going to miss our class!" The blond boy stood up and pulled the girl with him. "It’s just a phase, trust me. You’ll get through this."

* * *

"Wow! Kirschtein, I should be considered a lucky teacher to have such a talented student attending my class."

Petra Ral, the art teacher, also the teacher everyone else was in love with. She was always known of being optimistic, cheering her students and encouraging them to follow their hobbies and dreams. She often allowed them express themselves the way they pleased after a tough math class with Mr. Levi. She knew very well he was a strict teacher, so she was doing her best to change the mood for her students, although she admired Levi a lot. He was an amazing teacher, but most of the students seemed to hate him. She was pretty much the opposite of him. He was the students’ favorite teacher. No one hated her, ever.

"T-Thanks, Ms. Ral."

Jean Kirschtein, Horseface by Eren, everyone was aware of the big crush he had on Mikasa, as well as his failed attempts to ask her out on a date. Jean often had arguments with Eren, which was one of the reasons Mikasa never really liked him back. However, Armin and Jean were good friends. Armin was usually the one to stand between him and Eren whenever a new argument started.

"I-Is it okay to come in, Ms. Ral?" Armin asked in a nervous tone. He and Mikasa were late for class, apparently.

"Mr. Arlert, Ms. Ackerman, since you guys are one of my good students, I’ll excuse you this time. Go take your seats now."

"Thanks Ms. Ral."

"Thank you."

"Mr. Kirschtein, how about you show Ms. Ackerman what you drew for her?"

"Uh! S-Sure." Even though Jean wasn’t considered that close to Mikasa, she did appreciate his talent as an artist. He often drew portraits of her, and he also gave her one as a birthday present. She was keeping it still in her bedroom, hanged on the wall opposite to her door. She’d glance at it often before falling asleep.

This time wasn’t any different. Jean was improving, and each of his drawings was better than the other. He handed Mikasa the drawing, and surprisingly, Mikasa found it quite familiar. It was a drawing of her, standing under the rain, leaning against the wall. Mikasa gazed up at him with a questioning look. He blushed and looked away.

"I—I’m sorry. I wasn’t stalking you or anything…I was passing by and saw you there. I was coming to ask if something was wrong, but then I saw Mr. Levi talking to you, and then you left with him so—I didn’t have a chance to talk to you." He scratched the back of his head, nervously meeting her gaze. "I hope you’re feeling better today."

"I’m alright…Thanks." She held the drawing up to him, but he shook his head and smiled.

"Keep it." He nodded his head at her, and then went back to his seat. And just at that moment, for the first time in forever, Mikasa felt somewhat bad. Jean was a nice boy—a very nice boy, yet she kept on rejecting him.

"You went with Mr. Levi?" Eren, who got extremely curious after hearing Jean’s talk, leaned closer to Mikasa’s seat to ask. "You never said that when you got back home yesterday."

"Uh! It was nothing." She sighed then placed the drawing inside one of her books.

"Actually, it is. You hate Mr. Levi, so why did you go with him?" If he recalled clearly, she was cursing him only yesterday for kicking Eren out of his class.

"It was raining. I got soaked. He offered to drive me home, and I thought it would be rude to say no."

"You thought it would be rude—you’re always rude to him, though."

"Today’s lesson was important. I didn’t want to miss it because of catching cold."

"What a nerd." She glared at his words. "You still got home late. Why?"

At Eren’s question, Mikasa paused to a flashback from yesterday.

* * *

_“_ **Do you need a drive, Mikasa?** _”_

_The tone he was using was new to her._

_The look he was wearing was also new to her._

**_He_ ** _was completely new to her._

_“_ **No—I…don’t.** _”_ _She saw him gaze at her, as if he was trying to look into her soul, to see through her coldness, and it made her chest ache, because_ _**what if he could?** _

_“_ **…** **If you say so.** _”_   _He turned around and walked away then. She thought he was gone, and she exhaled for finally being alone, but she didn’t move. She wasn’t ready yet to go home._

_Her state was a mixture of confusion and loss. Her eyes were seeing everything fresh new, different and clear, but so confusing. The truth was so confusing._

_“_ **Get in…** _"_ _It was him again, Mr. Levi, and this time he brought his car and came back. He didn’t leave her there. He came back to pick her up. She couldn’t help but compare him to Eren, and the times when she was upset and Eren asked what was wrong. Whenever she refused to tell him, he’d just shout at her and leave her alone. He wouldn’t come back to check on her. He wouldn’t ask her if she was okay._

_He wouldn’t care nor act like he did._

_But Levi did._

_“_ **I said ‘Get in.’** _"_ _He insisted and she complied. She opened the door of his car, to find he was laying his jacket on the front seat for her to sit on without getting the seat wet._ _**He was a clean-freak** _ _, she remembered. “_ **Put the jacket on till you get home.** _"_ _**Huh?** _ _She assumed wrong. “_ **Hurry up.** _”_

_Mikasa closed the umbrella and handed it back to him. He placed it behind his seat as she held the jacket in her hand while sitting and closing the door. She put the jacket over her shoulders, and he began driving._

_“_ **Where’s your home at?** _"_ _He asked._

_“_ **I don’t want to go home.** _"_ _She wasn’t ready yet to see his face, Eren._

_“_ **Where do you want to go?** _”_

_“_ **I haven’t decided yet.** _”_

_“_ **Okay. Let me know once you’ve decided.** _"_ _Levi decided to head to his  apartment, without waiting for Mikasa to give him an answer she would never give, obviously. His eyes kept peeking at her every once and then. She seemed to be in deep thoughts and he hated to break the silence for her, thinking she was probably coming to conclusions in her head._

_Silence was important to solve the problems, something he, of all people, understood most because of his position as a math teacher._

_When the car stopped, it was parked in the garage of the building. Mikasa needed a couple of seconds before realizing the car wasn’t moving anymore. She lifted her head and looked through the window, then looked over at her teacher who was already stepping out._

_“_ **Are you going to stay in there?** _"_ _He leaned down to get a view of her face while asking, and she opened the door and stepped out of the car. “_ **Come.** _"_ _He walked ahead towards the elevator, and she followed him silently._

_They entered the elevator and stayed cage in deep quietness, till the sound of the door opening broke them free. Mikasa followed her teacher’s step in the long corridor, till they came to a stop once finally standing in front of his apartment. He pulled the keys out of his pocket and opened the door, inviting her in._

_She made herself comfortable and walked in as if this wasn’t her first visit to her teacher’s place. There was a strange, undefined scent that tickled her nostrils at the entrance, and she soon recognized it to be the scent of mint, mint and lemon. It was nice, kept the air fresh._

_The more she explored the house the more she had a better view of how well-organized her teacher was. Everything was in place, clean and bright. The furniture looked so fancy, too. She was satisfied just by looking at it._

_“_ **I’ll get you something to wear. The bathroom’s on your left.** _"_ _He addressed her while walking to his room. She turned left and saw the bathroom’s door open, easing her way to it. She walked in and stood in front of the mirror. She rarely took time to stare at herself in the mirror. The only times when she would were the ones when she was brushing her hair in the morning, or drying her hair with the towel for a couple of seconds._

_She looked at her reflection, and all she could see was a hopeless, broken girl. Her eyebrows pointed down, sticking a glare on her face. Her lips arched, creating a frown. Her hair was drenched and was drawing trails along her face from the still vivid drops running through it._

_She looked so lost. She realized and felt it, piercing through her like lightning. But she was glad, because her eyes were finally open to this image. How long had she been blinded from it?_

_“_ **Here, you can take a shower if you want. Just make sure not to pour water all over the floor and put your clothes in the laundry basket.** _"_ _He guided her, left the clothes and the towel he brought on the door hanger, then walked out and closed the door behind him. Mikasa was still figuring out a way to understand his change of attitude. How had he changed from an insufferable midget to a nice guy. Or perhaps he had always been a nice guy? Perhaps she was blurred from seeing his true self until now, just like she was blurred from seeing her true self._

_Mikasa pulled her cell out and shut it down. She undressed herself, and with each piece of clothing she removed, a piece of her old self was discarded, until she was standing there naked._

_She made a step into the tub, and then joined her left leg with the other. Her fingers pressed to the solid surface of the faucet, turning it on. She was sprayed with water, and her head tilted up to let the water wash her face._

_Mikasa pulled herself to sit under the water spout, eyes flickering in an attempt to provide the water from reaching in. She folded her legs and brought her knees closer, using them to rest her chin on them._

_There were so many things she wanted to think through, countless things, a whole life, wrong decisions she had made, people she lost and others she gained. But so little time she got. She didn’t know why she felt in a rush, though. Why was it that she never had time to think? Why was it that no matter what she did, she had to finish it quickly, because she didn’t have time…What did she have time for then? Other than thinking about Eren, and her growing feelings for him, the pain he was causing her, and the times she had swallowed it and forgave him, the countless words that hurt her when hearing from him. Being pushed away by her love ones was hell, and her silence was the fire that kept it torrid._

_She was so defenseless against him. She’d let him hurt her, but never would she ever let him get hurt. She’d protect him with her life. Heck, she’d bury her love for him with her own hands if needed to, but what for? What was she going to get in return? Rejection? More Pain?_

**_Why?_ ** _She wondered, knowing her question would never get answered, but she still wondered. If she didn’t have an answer, then who would? If she didn’t know why she was doing all of that for his sake, then who would?_

_She was hurt, and thinking hurt even worse._

_She got up and washed herself. It was cold, the weather was cold and so was life, and today they conspired against her. They aimed to freeze her in and out._

**_Lemons…_ ** _There was lemon scent again, but not quite the same as she smelled when entering the place._ _**Lemon-scented cake?** _ _It was filling up the air, and she inhaled, so deep, the nostalgic scent. Never would she forget that scent, when her mother was making a cake in the kitchen, and 9-year-old Mikasa was watching her from behind. She couldn’t see her face because she was facing her back, but she heard her faint voice “_ **You love this cake a lot, don’t you, honey?** _"_ _She replied with a yes, and her mother giggled. But right when she was about to turn around, the memory ended, and there was only a 16-year-old Mikasa, standing in the bathtub alone._

_But the smell was still there. It wasn’t an illusion._

_Quickly, she stepped out of the tub and grabbed the towel from the hanger, drying her body. She wore her underwear and the oversized shirt Levi brought her. She picked the clothes she came with from the floor and put them into the laundry basket as told. Wrapping a towel around her shoulder to dry her hair, she walked out of the bathroom, following the lemon scent. It came from the kitchen. She saw her teacher there, making coffee, and she saw the cake in the oven._

_“_ **Do you like tea? Or is coffee enough?** **_”_ ** _He turned around to ask. She was leaning against the counter, then decided to sit down._

_“_ **Coffee is good.** _"_ _She didn’t know he could cook, but to come and think of it, he lived alone, and he wouldn’t be living on snacks, not him, the clean-freak. She should have guessed he cooked, but again, she didn’t know a lot of things about him. He was just her math teacher anyway. It wasn’t of her interests._

_“_ **I hope you didn’t make a mess in my shower. I wouldn’t want to be your teacher outside of school too.** _"_ _He put the pot on fire and turned. “_ **Unless you’d pay for it.** _”_

_“_ **Thank you…for your** **_sudden_ ** **kindness, Mr. Levi. But it was your choice to bring me here, bear with me a little.** _"_ _She sneered._

_Levi smirked, taking a seat opposite to her, “_ **Sudden? Allow me to tell you, as a teacher, I never saw kindness a successful way of teaching. You’d only get students rebelling and neglecting their studies, which I will never allow in my class. Other teachers are free to do whatever the fuck they want.** _”_

**_Did he just curse?_ ** _”_ **Did you just curse?** _”_

_There was silence and intense staring for a moment, “_ **Whatever, we’re not at school, so stop acting like it. I already said I’m not doing my job outside too.** _”_

_“_ **If you hate your job then why did you become a teacher?** _"_ _It was rather awkward since he was complaining now._

_“_ **Because my parents thought I should learn how to behave better and treat kids like they were humans.** _”_

_“_ **Kids? We’re 16 and above.** _"_ _He thought of them as kids?_

_“_ **What? You don’t expect me to go teach 6-year-olds, do you? I’m 35, not senile. And then I would have probably done the exact opposite of what I was supposed to do, resulting in me ending up in jail because of hitting a child.** _”_

_“_ **You…talk a lot, don’t you?** _"_ _It was fascinating, somewhat, to hear her teacher talk that much and express himself._

_“_ **What do you mean? I always talk a lot. You just never talked to me before to know.** _"_ _He got a point. Until today, Mikasa had always hated him, talked negatively about him, cursed him countless times in silence, but today was the first she could spend this much time without cursing him. She didn’t see a reason to anyway. He was nice to her, offered her his umbrella and a drive, allowed her to use his bathroom and gave her clothes. He was so nice to her._

_“_ **You didn’t seem like the type of person who likes to talk.** _"_ _She admitted._

_“_ **Is there something you want to talk about?** _"_ _His question seemed to be mocking, but was honest. He would really love to talk to her, but she probably had no idea. “…_ **as long as it’s not about math.** _"_ _He added with a pointed look._

_She smiled unnoticeably, “_ **I don’t know…** _"_ _There were a lot of things she wanted to talk about. Perhaps her teacher would help her understand the things she couldn’t understand herself. She needed a mature opinion indeed, but she didn’t have anyone to go to._

_“_ **Why were you crying?** _"_ _Levi got up to check the coffee and the cake. She used that moment to come up with something to say, rather than telling him the boy she was in love with confessed he had feelings for another girl._

_“_ **You’ll probably think it’s…childish.** _"_ _He wouldn’t be wrong. It really sounded childish in her head._

_“_ **If it’s something like ‘My crush has a girlfriend’ then yes, it is absolutely childish.** _"_ _He stole the words from her lips, leaving her speechless._

**_Was it that obvious?_ **

_Her silence did give him an answer. He probably guessed correctly, “_ **I’d rather not have one of my smartest students crying over such things. You should understand that a girl like you doesn’t necessarily need a guy in her life to succeed. All you need is yourself, and that’s it. Look at me for example. I’m 35, never really dated anyone, yet I’m having a great life.** _”_

_“_ **You think your life is successful? I mean…you don’t seem to love your job that much…** _”_

_“_ **That’s not my point. You never really get what you want, Mikasa. But you should never let that be the reason for you to stop and give in.** _"_ _He turned the stove off, and placed the pot on the counter. “_ **You’re going to sound like a fucking 5-year-old who’d cry when they don’t get the thing they want, and won’t shut up about it.** _”_

_She frowned, realizing how dumb she must have sounded to him, how childish and immature._

_“_ **And let me say…If it’s Eren…then I assure you he’s never worth crying for.** _”_

_It felt as if he was reading her mind. Even though he said he didn’t want to do his job outside of school, he was doubtlessly studying her features, analyzing the meaning behind her every move. She felt insecure and secure at the same time. He hated his job, but he was doing it nevertheless, teaching her about life._

_Why did she never realize he was a great teacher before?_

_In the end, she should be thankful to Eren. If it wasn’t for him to break her heart, she would have never seen this side of her teacher. She would have missed so much without knowing._

_She was thankful to Eren, because if it wasn’t for him to break her heart, she would have probably never learned that her life didn’t depend on him, that she was the owner of her own choices, that she could lead her life the way she wanted, that she didn’t need a guy to stand up and walk._

_It was funny, though. Because as much as she wanted to believe that, it was thanks to Levi that she learned it. Thanks to a guy she supposedly didn’t need to live. She needed him to teach her that she didn’t need anyone._

_And life had her once again caged in confusion._

_“_ **The cake is baked, at last. Come here and help me out serve the coffee.** _"_ _He called for her, putting the gloves on before opening the oven to take out the cake. Its smell was filling the air, the same smell it held when her mother made it, and the nostalgia made her feel welcomed in this home. She left her seat and walked around the counter to get to him and help. That was enough to cure her broken heart, to show her the different meanings of love, which could be found in the simplest things, just like this lemon pound cake, a small thing which had her whole childhood caged in there. Memories of lost innocence—or not so lost, but her soul which found safety with a man she didn’t know much about, but would love to._

_TBC_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoyed the chapter. Please, let me know your thoughts.


	3. Chapter II: Confrontation

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Hello everyone! I can't believe I'm finally updating this fanfic. It's been long ten months, but to be quite honest, I didn't feel like ten months already passed since I last updated, because life kept too busy to notice how fast time went by. I'm so sorry for those of you who had been waiting so long for an update, and to make up for the ten-month hiatus, I made this chapter long.  
> Enjoy this chapter and let me know your thoughts!

**FORBIDDEN**

* * *

CHAPTER II:  _Confrontation_

"Where's Mikasa?" His hand paused an inch away from putting the spoon in his mouth, as his eyes spotted the absence of a familiar presence on the dinner table. His gaze then averted to his mother on his right, directing the question to her specifically.

"She said she wasn't hungry and said she was going to take a shower then head to sleep." The mother answered, though more words were still stuck at the edge of her tongue, "Is there something going on between you guys? I haven't seen you talking much these days."

"Huh?" Eyebrow arching questioningly at the inquiry, Eren shook his head, swallowing another spoon from his soup before giving a proper reply, "Not really… We do talk at school. I guess we're just busy with different things on our free time. This term's exams are coming soon, anyway. We'll most likely study together for those."

"Mhm, that's right. You should also call Armin over to study with you. He could help both of you as well." The father suggested as he passed his empty bowl over to his wife on her way to the washstand.

"Sure!" Eren dropped the spoon on the table and grabbed his bowl with both hands, sipping the soup directly from it, though his attention was attracted by the sound of the bathroom door closing in the upstairs.  _That must be Mikasa_. With that assumption, Eren placed his bowl down and stood up, "I'm full. Thank you mom, the dinner was great!" and immediately headed upstairs in a rush.

"Yep, definitely something's going on between them." The mother said, and her husband nodded from his place in agreement.

* * *

Mikasa was drying her hair with the towel, sitting on her bed, when Eren so suddenly barged into her room, closing the door behind him. "Hey!"

"You could have left the door open. I mean, what's the point in keeping it closed if you aren't going to knock?" She said in a sarcastic manner, and he gave her a cold expression in response, "What do you want?"

The boy remained silent briefly before attempting to answer, "It's… I just wanted to ask you…"

But she cut him off before he finished his question, already guessing what he wanted to ask, "I haven't spoken to her yet."

"Are you angry with me… Oh?" And at the same time, his question crossed paths with hers, seemingly something she wasn't expecting him to ask.

"Oh! I… I'm sorry I thought you were going to ask me about Annie." Her eyes then looked away from his, slightly embarrassed and regretful of the cold way she treated him just a moment ago.

The boy's eyes attempted to make contact with hers, though upon noticing her hesitance to meet his gaze, he invited himself to sit by her side on the bed, breaking the silence with another inquiry, "Mikasa… Did I, perhaps, do something stupid to you without noticing? Because if I did, you should tell me."

Only then she dared to look him in the eyes, lips parting as a flood of words threatened to spill.  _Yes, you did. You broke my heart, broke me… and this isn't the first time you ever do it_. "No…" But she only swallowed them, to let out a fake answer, "You didn't do anything, Eren."

"Are you sure?" He could see she wasn't telling him the truth. Her eyes would keep searching for a way out, and her grasp would tighten around the towel to cover her mouth. But she gave him a nod, and the smile she wore after reassured him a bit, his doubts slowly vanishing, "Okay, just making sure… By the way, you don't have to talk to Annie. I shouldn't bother you with my problems. I can talk to her myself."

"I don't have a problem talking to her. I just didn't have enough time. That's all." She clarified, yet he seemed to insist on what he decided, giving her a pointed look.

"It's okay, really. It's better if I talk to her myself. I don't want her thinking I'm sending my adoptive sister to talk to her instead because I'm too scared to do it myself. That's definitely not the impression I want her to have about me." He explained, quite determined about his decision. "Besides, I'm sure you got your own problems to take care of, and this is the only concern I have for now, so I should solve it by myself."

"As you wish." Not that she would argue about it anyway. Her insecurities wouldn't have allowed her to even look into the eyes her dear Eren had feelings for, and she couldn't say she wasn't grateful he ridded her from that burden.

Their conversation died right away, however, as if the two were strangers and no one of them knew enough about the other to initiate a proper talk. Eren's eyes wandered around her room in a try to see something he could comment about to overcome the awkwardness of the situation, until his gaze landed on her hair as she continued to dry it, "Look at your hair. It got long…" His hand then brushed a few strands lightly, only to bring back a vague memory of a night where his fingers ran through her dark hair, which was shorter by the time, the present differing in the distance separating them, for in his memory they were closer, so much closer. His breaths were mixed with hers, his nose brushing hers, and his head tilting to the side, only for their lips to join afterwards, sharing a kiss that eventually increased the temperature in their bodies. The memory ended then, though, as his body shivered upon the feeling it brought, "Sometimes I wonder…" his hand retreating a bit before coming to stroke her hair again.

"…About what?" She inquired, but his lips pressed together as if refraining from giving her an answer, perhaps he hadn't one, perhaps he hadn't the courage to tell her, or perhaps he didn't know himself. His hand stroking through the silkiness of her hair, leisurely coming to rest on her cheek, and only then she restored that one memory she shared with him, disturbing but beautiful at the same time, one she knew wouldn't happen again, though wished to.

"Why I never kissed you again after that night." He finished, his thumb brushing her lower lip tenderly, and he slowly inched closer to her, the distance between them dying, "Perhaps because… I felt that it was wrong? Because I was drunk?...  _We_  were drunk?" And even though his voice held guilt and regret, it also held longing and need, much stronger than the prior feelings, and that was what pushed forward, for he was never one to back down. His lips soon touched hers ever so lightly, as if testing her reaction, until he applied pressure and settled a heavier kiss upon her lips, when she in no way attempted to stop it, only closed her eyes and went along with it. Even while knowing she shouldn't be doing this, even while knowing he had feelings for someone else, and even after all the times he broke her heart, for a moment like this, another kiss from him, she'd become a sinner. Just like playing chess, and being real close to check mate, only for him to flip the chess table and start the game all over again. He never stopped playing her, as if she were a toy he desired when bored, and got rid of when having other  _important_  concerns. She  _knew_  this all too well, and yet, because it was him, she never minded being his toy. In a sense or another, she was  _his_  anyway, no matter what way.

The kiss lasted for long seconds, tension and temptation blossoming into hungry motions performed by his lips, only for hers to match. He was so good, even better than the last time he kissed her, and it got her to wonder if he ever kissed someone else as a practice, but it didn't matter. Now he was kissing  _her_ , for real and not a fantasy.

_Stop!_  A voice inside her head yelled at her.  _You deserve better. You don't deserve this_. The voice continued to admonish her, and right when she felt a hand wrap around her waist to bring her even closer to the warmth she always sought, she pushed away from it in an instant, swollen lips parting to let in some fresh air when her gaze settled upon his. And when finally curing from the contact they shared a moment ago, she could observe nothing in his eyes but shame and disruption. "Why are you doing this to me, when you love Annie?" Her inquiry wasn't only concerning the kiss they just shared, but all the temptation he caused within her all this time, with no clear intentions. For once, she was fed up with his childish, inconsiderate behavior, and for once, she got the courage to face him with that. "Eren, you don't just tell me you love her, and then come kiss me out of the blue, to act like nothing happened in the next morning and tell me that you have feelings for someone else."

"I do love Annie, okay?" His words cut through hers strictly, thick brows furrowing in frustration, "This doesn't mean anything. I wasn't lying when I said I had feelings for her."

"Then why don't you go kiss her instead of using me as a simple target to satisfy your desire for someone else?" She argued back, with no intention to stop before getting the answers she always needed.

"I'm not using you." For a brief second, his eyes widened in disbelief, only for another glare to appear shortly, "How can you even say that to me?"

"Well then do explain to me, because I'm tired of trying to guess!" She waited for him to explain, though all he did was look down to avoid her eyes. He had no explanations. He never had one. "It's always like this with you. You come to me whenever you're bored, make me think you actually… care about how I feel… But you don't. It's always about what you want and whether you're feeling like being with me or not. You never, even once, thought about how much it  _hurt_  me."

"Mikasa… I do care about you and you know that." His eyes finally looked up at hers, his voice no longer harsh, "I never meant to hurt you. I… I didn't  _think_  it would hurt you. You've always been so… strong, and I thought that you….."

"Just because I'm strong, doesn't mean I don't have feelings. Being strong doesn't mean I don't get hurt no matter what you do to me. That's not how it works." She shouted at him in defense, and it all became clear in her eyes. The same way she managed to see Levi's true person, she could see Eren's now, and what a disappointing sight indeed. "Actually, Eren, the truth is that you never thought about me. You never thought about anyone. You always think about yourself. You couldn't even see that your best friend, the only friend you got since your childhood, was in love with the girl you have feelings for…"

"What? You mean Armin?" The shock was obvious in his tone, his brows rising in surprise and disbelief and she wouldn't give him a second to swallow that fact.

"You're so blind. You couldn't even see that I loved you…" before she threw another shocking fact at him, and with those words being said, the tears in her eyes were set free, tracing down her pink cheeks. To finally say those words to him was like taking an entire mountain off her chest. So simple was it, nothing like she expected it to be, though the results wouldn't have changed either way. They weren't meant to be. They never were.

"I don't love you…" As harsh as his words were, his voice held sorrow and regret behind them, "At least, not that way. I can't feel sorry about it either… I just… don't feel that way for you." but he had to hurt her one last time before the wound started to heal. She was strong, and she'd get over it, he thought.

"There's nothing you should be sorry about anyway. It's my fault I didn't tell you." Her hands shakily rose to wipe her tears away, refusing to cry in front of him and allow him that victory, refusing to let him pity her. He thought she was strong, didn't he? And she should remain strong still. "You know, I should probably tell you this, too, before it's too late…" She bit back the words for an instant, quite unsure about exposing him to such matter, though proceeded to say anyway, thoughtlessly ignoring the possible consequences of what she were about to say, "I slept with Mr. Levi…"

"You… what? What the fuck?" The sorrow he felt a moment ago was kicked away hurriedly by her final statement, his shock preventing him from saying anything until her words fully sunk in.  _She what?_  He asked himself again, "Are you out of your fucking mind? He's our  _teacher_. He's too old and you're too young. Do you realize how much trouble you can get into if anyone ever finds out about that? Do you even realize how terrible what you've done is?"

"So now you decided to be mature and educate me about what I should and shouldn't do?" Her voice was lifeless at this point, as if her soul was absorbed from her body. She gazed at him with dead eyes, and he only gritted his teeth in response, irritated by her nonchalance.

"Do whatever the fuck you want. I don't fucking care." Eren stood up and walked to the door, and as he held the knob, he turned around to look at her, "Even if I don't say anything, if my mom ever finds out, Mr. Levi will be going nowhere but to jail." He then opened the door and walked out of the room, slamming it closed behind him then heading straight to his room.

By the time Eren left, Mikasa came to realize how big of a mistake she had made by starting such a die lie. Even if it was a lie, what if Carla head about it indeed?

"Eren!" Carla who stood in the stairs called for her son upon seeing him obviously irritated, but he walked into his room and locked the door without even glancing at his mother. She sighed and continued her way upstairs, and once finally arriving at the first floor, she knocked Mikasa's door then invited herself in, "Mikasa, did you and Eren argue? He looked so angry just now—" Carla's words were cut when her eyes caught the sight in front of her; Mikasa crying, sitting on her bed and hugging her pillow. The woman closed the door and walked over to her, sitting down by her side as her hand reached to rest on hers comfortingly, "Mikasa, honey, what's wrong? Did Eren say something to you?"

"…Aunt Carla…." Her voice trembled, too weak to say more and she only sobbed into her pillow harder.

"Sweetie, you can tell me what's wrong. I'm here for you." Carla reassured her, and only then did Mikasa throw the pillow aside to jump into her embrace, Carla welcoming her with a warm hug in return, fingers running through her long strands with a light smile on her lips. "It's okay…"

"Aunt Carla,… I miss mom and dad." She murmured huskily against Carla's chest, and the woman's heartbeats quickened, feeling her chest tighten at Mikasa's words.

The woman, who was like a second mother to her, wrapped her arms tightly around her, patted her back, and kissed her forehead, whispering to her softly, "It's okay to miss your parents, darling. I'm sure they miss you too, but then, that only makes me feel bad. Was I not a good mother enough to you?"

"I-It's not that… You are an amazing mother…." The girl pulled away from Carla to look up at her as she wiped her tears, "I'm grateful for everything you've done for me. You raised me, and taught me… I'm glad to have you with me… I just… I wish my mom and dad were here. I wish they never left me in the first place… and sometimes… sometimes I wish they would have taken me with them, maybe then I would-"

"No!" Carla stopped her immediately from finishing her words, "Don't you ever say that again to my face, Mikasa. You can't." The woman's gaze softened as she continued, "You're like Eren is to me, Mikasa. You're my child, and I'm ready to give my life away if it meant you and Eren could live." With a smile, the woman patted Mikasa's head, "So if anything, your parents are grateful to not have taken you with them that day." The tears almost threatened to fall, but she concealed them to cheer the girl up, "You understand, right? Your life is precious, and you're not alone. You have me, and you have Grisha and Eren too. We're all here for you. We are your family."

Her words soothing the girl at last, Mikasa nodded with a smile, "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to say that. I'm happy to be with you all."

Carla, relieved at least after seeing the girl smile, she smiled back, "Now, now, you got school tomorrow, so why don't you get to bed? You're tired, aren't you?"

She nodded, and as Carla stood up, Mikasa got under her bed sheets, ready to sleep.

Carla watched her figure tenderly before she leaned down to plant a kiss on her forehead, "Good night, Mikasa."

"Good night, aunt Carla." Mikasa smiled lightly as Carla left her room, her eyes drifting to the piece of drawing she hanged on her wall, the drawing that always lulled her to sleep whenever she was sad. Jean had given it to her that one day, when he confessed his feelings to her and asked her to be his girlfriend, which she declined in the most polite way she could maintain. Her rejection still broke his heart anyway, and she wondered whether she only rejected him because she had feelings for Eren, or if she did it out of selfishness; because she knew Eren would never be hers since the beginning, and because she was hurt for a long time, and wanted Jean to be as hurt as she was. She couldn't deny how bad she felt for rejecting him, though. The boy had treated her nicer than Eren had ever since she moved in to live with his family. They grew up together, and he rarely ever treated her kindly. He was so hot-headed, and she didn't agree with most the rebellious things he did as a child (not that she'd agree with what he'd do now).

Jean, on the other side, was the first guy who ever told her she was beautiful. For so long she belittled herself and her appearance. She couldn't say she was so feminine, perhaps that was why Eren never looked at her the way she looked at him. If she were to compare herself to Annie, Annie was much, much prettier. She dressed nice every day, and her hair was even more beautiful. She admitted she wasn't as pretty as she was, and she tried to dress more feminine in hopes to get Eren's attention, but all he'd say to her was how those clothes didn't suit her, or how he didn't like her with long hair. He liked Annie with long hair, though. But she cut her hair for him nevertheless; perhaps he'd notice her then.

That day, he told her that long hair was so much better than short, and she spent the whole break at school crying. She loved her long hair too. She didn't want to cut it, but for him, she did it anyway. Jean had heard them talking that time when Eren had told her how long hair didn't suit her, and he probably only said that because Jean said otherwise. The two didn't get along, and so Eren would oppose to everything Jean said. Jean saw her crying during the break and tried to comfort her. He told her that Eren was dumb and that she shouldn't pay attention to anything he said. He was right about that. Everyone knew Eren was stupid. She knew it too, but she still loved this stupid boy.

Carla and Grisha, too, knew very well of Eren's irresponsibility, and that was why they entrusted her to take care of him and the house while they were gone for two days. She thought she'd have it under control, but she didn't. Eren went to his father's basement where he kept a bunch of rare wine bottles there, which he'd occasionally serve at parties and family gatherings. The stubborn boy refused to listen to Mikasa asking him to get out of the basement, and he opened a bottle of wine to drink. She ended up following him downstairs, and he'd had drunk half the bottle already when she arrived. He invited her to join him, but she refused to. He insisted, telling her that he always wanted to spend some time alone with her and this was their chance to do whatever they wanted. Foolishly, she believed those words, and took a sip after another until she finished the rest of the bottle. Eren pulled a second one, and they shared that one too. They got drunk, and neither could get up, so they sat down on the ground leaning against the wall, Mikasa's head resting on his shoulder.

He'd looked at her with half open eyes, his nose bumping her head. She smelled nice, and her hair was so soft. She lifted her head to look at him, and his hand reached to brush a few strands of hair out of her face, to rest on her cheek next. She smiled at him, and how beautiful that smile looked on her. If only she smiled often. He knew the wine affected him, but he couldn't help it anyway. He leaned forward against his well, and pressed his lips to hers. That was the first time, and the last too, they ever shared such an intimate moment together. She'd thought that perhaps from now on they'd become closer. She thought that maybe even if the wine played a big role in what happened, he still kissed her because he always wanted to. But that wasn't how things were. The next morning, he apologized to her and told her how dumb it was from him to do such a thing. She wanted to tell him it was okay, if he didn't continue to say that he imagined he was with someone else, not her, or else he would have never kissed her.

Someone else…

_Annie?_

Eren hadn't had told her yet about his feelings for Annie, but she knew from the way his eyes would always follow her whenever she'd pass by them when they were talking. She noticed how he'd pout whenever she greeted Armin, and wouldn't even notice he was there. How she wished he looked at her like that. How she wished he felt that way whenever Jean came to talk to her. But the same way her eyes saw him only, his saw Annie alone and she knew that he would never feel the same about her, because she'd never feel the same about anyone else.

That day when he had confessed his feelings for Annie to her, her soul abandoned her body. Even though she knew it already, she never wanted to live to see the day he'd tell her he had feelings for someone else. To top it all, he even asked her to talk to Annie for him. A part of her still wished that was a joke, one big fucking lie he was playing on her, one that would end with him telling her he loved her and all of this was just to mess around with her. But that was too much to wish for. It wasn't a lie. Eren was always straight-forward about what he thought and felt. He wouldn't lie.

Eren never gave her a reason why she shouldn't stop loving him, but was it because she grew up with him that she found it hard?  _Probably._

He had hurt her a lot, countless of times, even when it came to the littlest things, and even though she cried her eyes out tonight, she still felt so proud of herself, as if she had just jumped to a whole different level of life. Her broken heart seemed to be healing slowly the longer she thought about it, about how she finally faced him with the truth, as if that was all she had to do in order to stop thinking about him, to stop  _loving_  him.

That night, she slept with a smile on her face.

* * *

"Hey, Armin! I hope I'm not late. What's the score?" Jean, entering the gym in a rush and taking a seat next to Armin, inquired, his eyes searching the game court looking for Mikasa.

"Mikasa's team is winning!" Armin reassured him with a smile.

"Yes! Of course! I shouldn't have expected something else!" Jean mumbled excitedly to himself.

"Actually, Mikasa looks so determined to win today, something I haven't seen in her in a while now. It's good to know she's back." Armin noted in addition.

"Honestly, since Annie's playing in the other team, it must be a reason enough for her to be determined. The girls don't really get along that well, do they?" Jean's gaze turned to Armin briefly before focusing on the game again, though his eyes instantly drifted back to the side, observing Eren who was sitting a few seats away from them. "Why is he sitting alone?"

"Hm?" Armin gave Jean a confused look, ignoring whom he was talking about, though he looked up to where Jean was looking and saw Eren to understand, "Ah! I don't know. I tried to talk to him today and he acted quite rudely to me. I don't know what happened. He probably had an argument with Mikasa or something." He tried to make a guess.

"Then I guess he's not here for Mikasa, is he?" Jean questioned.

"He's not, indeed. He's here for Annie." Armin answered, a hint of sadness tugging at the corner of his lips as he smiled.

"Are they dating? I didn't know that." Jean raised his eyebrows in surprise, but Armin shook his head.

"They're not. They will be, soon, though." Or so he thought.

"Well good for them. I don't really care whom he's dating as long as it's not Mikasa." Jean crossed his arms and focused on the game instead, but the moment his eyes found Mikasa, he saw her tripping and falling to the ground quite harshly, and the PE teacher ran immediately toward her as well as the rest of her teammates. Jean and Armin who saw what happened stood up too and rushed to check on her.

"Ms. Ackerman, are you alright? Are you hurt?" The teacher asked, helping the girl sit up slowly.

"I'm fine… It's okay Ms. Zoe…" She reassured, though she whined when she felt her ankle aching, "I think I sprained my ankle…"

"Oh, that's not too bad. We need to get it checked to make sure, though. Let's take you to the infirmary." The teacher stated, wrapping Mikasa's arm around her shoulder and helping her up.

"Mikasa, are you alright?" Armin arrived along with Jean.

"What happened?" Jean asked, eyes glistening with concern..

"I'm okay, guys. Don't worry. I just sprained my ankle." She reassured them and walked ahead with her teacher toward the infirmary.

"You guys wait until I'm back, alright?" The teacher said and continued to walk away with the injured girl.

"I wonder what happened. She was playing fine the whole match and suddenly she lost focus. Ugh! We were so close to win!" Sasha complained before sitting down on the floor to wipe the sweat off her forehead. "Now we have no chance. We're doomed."

"It's all Eren's fault!" Jean claimed, aiming a death glare over at the boy who maintained his seat.

Armin raised a brow at him, "Eren's fault? How so?"

"She was looking at him and he got her distracted." Jean explained, "I saw her looking his way."

"Ah!" Armin frowned a little bit then looked up at Eren who was still sitting in his place, didn't even bother to come and check on Mikasa. "Then they definitely had an argument."

Eren then grabbed his schoolbag, stood up and went down the stairway to the game court where everyone else was. Ignoring Armin and Jean, he headed towards Annie, who was standing with her teammates and played it as if she didn't notice him.

"Annie, can we talk for a minute?" Eren asked with a serious tone, though he didn't wait for an answer and was about to walk away from the crowd, expecting her to follow him.

"I don't have a minute, Jaeger." But she only brushed her bangs behind her ear and looked away from him.

"Well then make it." He insisted, aiming a glare down at the shorter girl and she raised an eyebrow at him.

"Don't you have manners at all? How do you expect me to make some time for you when you talk to me like that?" She glared back at him, and he grabbed her arm quite aggressively, but she managed to pull it out of his grasp easily.

"Annie, stop it." He insisted, "I need to talk to you. Don't take me so fucking lightly."

"Or else what?" She persisted, attempting to provoke him, interested to see what the boy was capable of, "You can't do shit, Eren. You're not fooling anyone. And I'm not going anywhere with y—" but she didn't get to finish her words when she felt something soft press to her lips so suddenly, though the softness quickly disappeared as she felt pressure being applied. What the hell was happening?

_He kissed her!_

Everyone in the gym stared at the two with wide open eyes, a bit shocked and surprised; shocked that Eren  _dared_  to kiss her, and surprised that he kissed  _her_ , the only exception being Jean and Armin who were already aware of what was happening.

Eren didn't seem to be pulling away any time soon. It was time he kissed the girl instead of relishing his fantasies with someone else, yet Annie wasn't willing to give it to him on a golden plate, and she had to stop him in her own way, aiming a punch straight to his stomach which got him to break the kiss and fall back in pain. There was a proud smile across his face anyway. At least he got to kiss her finally.

"Do you have a death wish, Eren?" Annie shouted at him, cheeks flushed out of embarrassment, but that wasn't enough to conceal how furious she was right now.

"Maybe." He rubbed his stomach where she punched him then smiled up at her, sitting on the floor with a rather amused expression, "If it meant I can see you blush madly for me then I'm ready to die."

"You fucking asshole!" His comment pissed him off, drawing her attention to the fact that everyone else could see her blush. Just how dare Jaeger put her in such a situation? She leaned down and grabbed him by the collar with a threatening look, "You think this is a fucking joke?"

He didn't respond, only smiled and made her trip with the use of his foot to make her fall on top of him, only for his arms to wrap around her waist and pull her in for another kiss, a deeper and a passionate one this time. Surprisingly, she only fought it for the first seconds and gave in to it afterwards, returning the kiss fervently as everyone who was present stood watching them.

Perhaps she failed to stop him, but she'd still show him just how aggressive and fierce she could be.

Armin stood in silence, and while everyone else whispered about the scene playing in front of them, his eyes shyly observed the way his best friend had his dreams' girl in his lap, kissing her in front of everyone, in front of  _him_. He'd guessed Eren learned about his feelings for Annie; the reason why he didn't want to talk to him today, but never had he thought Eren would kiss her in front of him as if it was nothing. He was hurt, disappointed, and betrayed, and he turned away to leave the gym shortly, Jean following him too.

* * *

Mikasa was sitting on a bed after having her ankle bandaged, her PE teacher standing in front of her while the medic left the room.

"You better rest for a while here until you feel like you can walk." Hanji advised the girl, and she nodded. They heard a knock on the door before they saw Levi entering the room, which surprised them a bit.

"Levi! What brought you here?" Hanji questioned, quite surprised to see him.

"Is she alright?" He asked, looking at Mikasa.

"Oh, yeah. Don't worry about her. She sprained her ankle, nothing big!" She smiled, "Well, I better be going now, before the bell rings. I almost forgot I left your classmates alone. I'll see you later, and Mikasa, rest well. You should probably head home to rest." She said as she walked out of the room, closing the door behind her and leaving Levi and Mikasa alone.

There was silence as Levi stood by the door looking at her, and her eyes kept avoiding his. He noticed then walked in and sat on a chair opposite to her. "What happened back there? You were playing perfectly just before I arrived."

Then she looked up at him, recalling what happened in the gym: She was all focused on the game. Her only goal was to win the match, if it wasn't for her to get distracted upon the entrance of Levi to the gym. She saw him standing a couple of seats behind Eren, and suddenly all her focus moved from the game to him, forgetting that she had jumped in the middle of the air, and fell instantly to the ground.

"I—I got distracted, I guess." She admitted, her eyes digging deep in the floor.

"I noticed. That's why I asked." He said, "I distracted you, which means in a way or another, I caused that injury of yours." He added with a hint of guilt in his tone.

"No! You didn't distract me… it's not your fault, I just…" She tried to explain, "I just didn't focus enough. Don't blame yourself for it."

"If that's what you say…" He decided to drop the topic, "Your performance was impressive, though. I didn't know you were as good in basketball as you are with math."

"I still think I need to train more, but thank you, Mr. Levi." She smiled a bit, satisfied by his compliment.

"You know, I used to play too when I was your age." She found it hard to believe, judging by his height, "I won every time. And I know it might sound impossible. You're probably thinking 'How could this short man play basketball?' but I shit you not, I used to kick ass in every game I played."

She didn't know what was funnier: the fact that he used to play basketball and win, or the fact that he was using that language of his inside the school property. "So, why did you stop playing?" She decided to skip the laughter.

"I got old," He gave her the most relevant answer, "and busy… and I didn't have anyone to play with anymore. My friends were gone."

"It's kind of hard to imagine you had friends. No offense, sir." She didn't think he was that friendly, well at least he didn't look it. Although recently she realized how wrong she was about him.

"You don't look like the friendly type either, I hope you know that. But you still got friends anyway." He pointed out, and his statement only made her realize how similar they were. "So how are you going home with that?" He asked, pointing at her twisted ankle.

"I can manage." She hoped she could.

"Or… I can give you a ride. I don't have any more classes for the day and I was just about to go home." He offered.

"That's nice of you…" She smiled, but decided to decline the offer, "But… I think one ride was more than enough… People might get the wrong idea…" and by people, she meant Eren. She didn't want to get the man in trouble because of a stupid lie she had to make up. Eren wouldn't keep silent about it for so long and she didn't plan on telling him the truth, yet.

Levi found her words a bit odd, and his eyebrow rose, demanding clarification.  _Where did her mind go?_  "What kind of wrong ideas people might get? People will only get the wrong idea if you think they would." He shook his head at her naivety, "But I'm not going to insist anyway." He added before standing up, "Rest well, and get better soon. Exams are approaching."

"Thank you… Thank you for everything, Mr. Levi…" She said in almost a whisper, but he heard her, and paused at the door glancing at her while she stared back at him. It was him who gave her the courage last night. It was his voice that awoke her from falling for the same mistake she'd always fallen for, and she was grateful to him more than anything, even though he probably had no idea what she meant.

"You're welcome." He nodded, and opened the door to leave, "Oh, you're here too?"

She heard him talk to someone, and once her gaze went up again, she saw Eren standing outside, and her heart skipped a beat.  _Had he been listening to them?_

"Well, I'd better be leaving now. I'll see you both tomorrow." With that, Levi took his leave, as Eren stood at the door, sending a pointed look at Mikasa, refusing to enter the room after seeing Levi just leaving.

So she wasn't lying about what she had told him yesterday. She was indeed sleeping with their teacher, or else what was he doing here checking on her?

"Eren…" She wanted to explain to him, to tell him that it wasn't what he thought. She wished he'd listen to her, and maybe she'd tell him that she lied to him last night, but he turned away from her and walked off, seeing that there was no need to see how she was doing.  _Her boyfriend just left._

Levi was standing in the hallway still, and he saw Eren leaving without entering. Hadn't he com to see Mikasa? Weird. What was weirder, however, was the way Eren looked at him when he saw him leaving the room, as if he'd done something wrong. What was it with these two? First Mikasa implying that people might get the wrong idea if they saw them together and now Eren looking at him the same way Mikasa just implied. He didn't recall him being so protective of Mikasa. Normally, it was the pother way around. He'd watched Mikasa long enough to know how she acted around Eren. She'd keep ordering him around, as if he was a kid, and Eren always hated that and never listened to her. He was a reckless boy, Levi noticed, and somehow he could see why Mikasa would interfere in most of what he'd do, but he also thought she should let the kid learn on his own. He wished he'd see her one day stepping aside and leaving Eren to face his problems by himself.

But that was none of his business.

Mikasa was a very good student, and it was very unpleasant to him to see her lost. She was always top of her class, and he wished she could solve her personal problems the way she solved math problems. He didn't understand her strong attachment to Eren much, because, to him, the boy wasn't really worth all the attention she gave him, at least judging by the way he treated her. He didn't deserve it.

That day he'd seen her talking to Eren, mostly Eren talking to her while she stared at him in silence most of the time. He didn't hear what they were talking about, but it must have been something hurtful. He saw how she stayed still after Eren had left her, how she leaned against the wall and looked down, her bangs covering her eyes, but he knew she was crying. She didn't move, even though it started raining, and he waited in his car to see whether she'd leave soon or not. She didn't seem to have any intention of leaving, though, and so he wanted to offer her his umbrella at least, so that she wouldn't catch cold.

He hesitated for a second as he stepped out of his car, a strange feeling seemed to put weight on his chest, but he walked to her anyway, and offered her his umbrella. Her hair and clothes were already drenched, and she looked at him with an empty gaze, as if someone sucked out all her feelings and left her there. He couldn't leave her, not when she looked at him like that, not when she looked so weak and broken. She, as his student, never treated him so nice (which she should have), and he understood it was probably because of the way he'd yell at Eren most of the time, because she'd send a pointed look at him whenever he did so. But still, he liked the fact that she was the only one of all his students who dared to look back at him, and sometimes she'd even talk back to him. He liked that Mikasa Ackerman. He appreciated her. He didn't recognize the one looking at him now. It was the first time he saw her like that, and he hated it.

He offered her a ride home, knowing how she probably wouldn't leave for she seemed to be lost in thoughts, but she had denied his offer, and he didn't want to argue, but he knew she needed a ride, whether she'd admit it nor not. He didn't have to take her home. He understood that she probably didn't want to be there, so he was ready to take her wherever she wanted, perhaps to a friend's? But when he asked her where she wanted to go, she didn't have an answer, and that was okay by him. He didn't mind. He decided to take her to his place; perhaps visiting a new place would help her relax. He couldn't really tell why he cared about how she felt so much. She'd been his favorite student for sure, but that was the only relationship he had with her, if he could even label it as a relationship. They never talked outside of school, and even if he had tried to, she would have refused to talk to him, so a part of him was a bit grateful to have found her in this state, despite hating how she looked.

He let her use his bathroom, which was a big deal to him even if it wasn't to her. He never let people use his bathroom, or touch his stuff, but for some reason he was okay with her doing so. He never realized she held such a dear place in his heart until now. Surely he noticed how often he'd gaze at her during class, sometimes even when he wasn't teaching; his eyes would still search every corner until they spot her. He loved watching her outside of class, the small things she did that made her more likeable, the way she'd cover her face with her scarf whenever she felt embarrassed or insecure, the way she'd glare at Eren whenever he said something stupid, and the way she'd smile, especially when she smiled. She looked so beautiful—but she was just his student, and it was okay for him to look at her from afar, right?

He was happy when she complimented his lemon-scented cake, and he loved watching her eat it. She seemed to be slowly going back to be the Mikasa Ackerman he always knew, and it meant so much to know he could help her forget, even for a brief time, about the things that made her sad. Somehow he felt so honored to know that he meant something for her even a little bit, and that a little part of her heart was saved for him.

When he came out of the bathroom after taking a shower, he saw her sleeping on his couch. She must have been tired. He was going to do laundry, but he placed the laundry basket down and went to his room to get her a cover, and when he came back, he paused in front of her, laying the sheet over her, but refused to move away from the couch, for his eyes kept staring at her. She looked so peaceful while asleep, so relaxed, her brows weren't furrowing, and her lips didn't frown.

She looked awfully beautiful.

Today, he only had two classes to teach, and then he could go home and rest, but he still had an entire day to do that, so he decided to pay a visit to the school's gym, coincidently finding the girls playing basketball, and Mikasa was there. He stood at the door watching the game for a while, admiring how good of a player she was, and then he realized he should probably take a seat instead of standing, that way he could watch her better. But he couldn't even sit down before the girl tripped and fell upon seeing him there, which he found strange for his presence never seemed to distract her before, so it was a first. He'd wanted to go and check if she hurt herself, but he wasn't comfortable with the entire crowd of students being around, so he waited until she was taken to the infirmary, and he followed behind her shortly.

He didn't expect she would admit she got distracted because of him, but that was only because of a stupid thought that crossed his mind, which he regretted the second he thought about, but what if, in a way or another, Mikasa was interested in him? So unlikely, sure, and he dropped the idea immediately. That was an improper thing to think about in the first place, and even if it were true, she would have denied that he was the source of her distraction, but she didn't. Was it because she was straight-forward even when it came to such matters?

He had to stop thinking like that. What the hell had gotten into him? He was crossing the line as her teacher, and he should be more aware of the things he thought about concerning her.

After all,  _people might get the wrong idea._

He was surprised when she said that after he asked if he could drive her home. It was strange that she was thinking that way. Had she noticed something about him? Did he make a slip without noticing? He didn't know, and he wouldn't ask her, either. It would make it more suspicious, and he decided he should maybe take a step back and leave her this time, or else he'd draw attention to him, which he didn't want.

And when he was about to leave, she thanked him. He didn't exactly know why, but to know that she was thankful to him meant a lot to him, and he needed her to know that whenever she needed something, or someone, he'd be the first to offer help to her. To have a special place in her heart was a wish he wanted to accomplish, even if he recognized how wrong it was.

* * *

"They started making out in front of everyone in the gym. I heard they even did it in the bathroom that day."

"Really? I heard someone caught them doing it inside a car."

The news about Eren and Annie were spreading so fast; within a week, the whole high school knew they were dating, even though most of what everyone heard was plain rumors and falsely transferred information, which they enjoyed to the fullest for seeing the faces people would make whenever they saw them together was a blast.

The only correct part was them making out in the gym, and then Eren asking her to be his girlfriend, which she surprisingly said yes to. No one expected that but a few, for Annie never seemed to pay Eren any attention. It turned out she was only trying to get him to face her about his feelings like a real man, and only then she would know he was good enough for her. He'd proven himself in front of her and everyone else, and she was more than satisfied. The two would be seen together ever since, holding hands, flirting, and even making out.

It had been a week, a long one, and it was enough to partially heal some broken hearts.

"So, how long do you think it will take him to talk to us again?" Mikasa asked her friend as they both sat together during the break, sending sneaky gazes over at Eren and Annie.

"Well, if my calculations were right, it must be any moment now." Armin answered, sitting next to her, and the two looked toward Eren and waited. It only took him a moment before he whispered something to Annie and walked toward his friends. "See, I told you!"

"Um… There's something I need to say to you two…" Eren mumbled quite hesitantly as he arrived at the table where his friends were sitting, rubbing the back of his head as he looked to the side. They kept silent, waiting for him to say whatever he had, "I'm sorry about the way I treated you guys the whole past week." His eyes finally looked at them, "It was stupid and I was… Well, I was angry and you know how dumb I act when I'm angry."

They stared at him for a couple of seconds, making him a bit nervous about what they would say back, but they smiled and stood up to hug him.

"It's okay!" Armin assured him. "We're used to it now, Eren."

"It's good to have you back!" Mikasa added, and the friends hugged for a good while before they let go of each other.

"Armin, I'm sorry for acting like a jerk to you, and I'm sorry about being ignorant about your feelings for Annie." Eren said, seemingly regretful, "I'm such a horrible friend, and I'm so sorry for kissing her in front of you that day… I should have asked you first if you were okay with it before I asked her to date me… Please forgi-"

"It's alright, Eren." Armin smiled softly at him, "I didn't get mad at you. As long as you're happy, I'm happy too. We're friends after all, and our friendship is more important to me than anything else."

Eren smiled back at his friend before looking to Mikasa now, "Mikasa… I'm sorry about the way I treated you, and I'm sorry about your ankle. Jean kept bugging me about it the whole week, and I felt so bad. I hope it got better now."

"Huh? Why are you sorry about my ankle? You had nothing to do with that..." Mikasa raised an eyebrow at him in confusion.

"You don't have to lie about it. Jean told me that you got distracted while looking at me. I… honestly I didn't even realize you were looking at me, I was… I was too busy staring at Annie to even notice." He said with a hint of shame and sorrow in his voice.

"But it wasn't your fault, Eren, really." She explained, "Jean must've got it wrong. I wasn't looking at you."

"Really?" He raised a brow, and she nodded, "That fucking asshole! I'll fucking kill him."

"Hey, Eren, I don't think he was trying to pick a fight with you. He thought she was looking at you, but apparently she was looking at something else… or someone." Armin tried to calm his friend down. "He must've missed it is all."

"He still won't get away with it!" Eren huffed, "Well, my girl's waiting for me, so if you'd excuse me!" He said, looking back at Annie.

"Sure, you go take care of business." Armin chuckled, letting go of Eren and so did Mikasa.

"I'll see you guys later!" Eren added before running back to his girlfriend.

"Well, at least he looks happy, right?" Armin said in almost a whisper, looking at Mikasa.

"Yeah… I didn't think she could make him happy…" A smile settled upon Mikasa's lips temporarily. She'd been too consumed in jealousy to think of the good side of Eren being with Annie. All she ever wanted for Eren was to see him smile, happy, and ever since he started going with Annie, he smiled more, and most importantly, he became happier.

"Well, I gotta pay a visit to the library for a bit. I have this science project to work on with Jean and he must be waiting for me. I'll see you later, Mikasa." Armin excused himself before waving at his friend and leaving in a rush.

Mikasa watched him as he left, then looked over at Eren with Annie before she walked ahead, and as she did so, her eyes landed on an unpleasant sight, or at least she found it unpleasant. Levi was walking with their art teacher, Ms. Ral, heading to his car. They seemed to be having a fun discussion for the two of them were smiling before getting into his car and taking off. She didn't know exactly why, but she wasn't so happy to see him taking someone else in his car. And she had thought he'd been this nice to her only, and even felt special because of it, but now she couldn't help but think he was probably nice to everyone, and that he treated her just like he'd treat any other woman.

It strangely hurt her, but not in a way that would leave her broken and dead from the inside, no, but in a way that planted ideas in her head—very naughty ideas, as if she was challenging herself this time to get what she wanted by force, although what she wanted this time was quite far from her reach, quite forbidden for her to even think about, but then again she was always one to take the risk when it came to risky matters.

Even if it meant making her teacher fall in love with her.

Even if it meant crossing the borderlines between a student and her teacher, she'd still do it.

_TBC_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: This chapter focused more on Mikasa getting over her feelings for Eren, so I do hope you didn't mind the EreMika moments I added. For the people who were disappointed that Annie didn't make an appearance in the previous chapter, I hope I did her justice in this one. Hopefully you liked this chapter, and I'd like to know your thoughts, so a review would be so nice, though reading alone is more than enough!


	4. Chapter III: Breaking Boundaries

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi hi! I know it's been long since the last update and maybe you care or not about the reasons as to why I haven't updated this in a long time. If you care, proceed to read, if not, it's okay, just skip over to the chapter.
> 
> I've had this third chapter (and fourth) drafted on my pc for the longest possible, and I intended to keep on writing chapter drafts just to see what direction I'll be taking things, but then my pc crashed, and I could not, for the life of me, afford to get it fixed. I've been sitting for my entire summer break last year without a pc, was not able to write anymore, and so my interest slowly died, not only in this fanfic, but also in SnK in general, and so when I finally got my pc fixed, I was way out of the SnK fandom to get myself to keep writing this. But as it is I finally brought myself to catch up on the manga again, I went back and started reading the drafts I abandoned for months, and it sparked my need to resume working on this. I literally changed just a few words here and there, as I ended up quite liking how the first draft came out. Excuse me if it's a little crappy in comparison to the previous chapters. Hopefully you forgive my long, unpardonable disappearance.
> 
> Enough with the rambling now. I hope you enjoy this chapter. Thank you, everyone who bookmarked and fav'ed and reviewed, it definitely helps out a lot.

* * *

**FORBIDDEN**

* * *

CHAPTER III: _Breaking Boundaries_

"Your test will be tomorrow and I won't accept any excuses. You either get good grades or you don't ever show up to my class again. Am I clear?" Harsh tone colored each word he spoke. A horrifying glare was being sent at the students, drawing cautiousness and nervousness among them, with the exception of one, particular student, who always looked nothing but indifferent about his statements. Cold gaze meeting the other's as silence settled down.

 _She's been doing this a lot,_ he thought, _staring._ Not that she hadn't stared at him before, but the way she was doing it for the past week was quite… _interesting_.

Carefulness became his all-time wear ever since the incident in the infirmary. Drawing attention to him -her attention, specifically- wasn't going to do him any good. A man in his thirties should know better to consider his actions before committing them. Though, when it came to Mikasa Ackerman, he no longer was a man in his thirties. Childish, clumsy, lightheaded, or so the way her aura made him. His self-restrain would threaten to break at any moment, foolish words never stopped dancing at the edge of his tongue, and perhaps by now he had made a few slips he regretted, such as offering her another ride, which she declined, and it could have all been forgotten, had she not pointed out how _people could get the wrong idea_.

His heart had skipped a beat at such words coming from her of all people.

He'd been so careful ever since, glancing at her less than he used to, even trying to spend more of his free time with other teachers. Most of them didn't really like talking to him, probably because he scared them the same way he did his students, though there was that one teacher; Petra Ral. She was an art teacher, nice, friendly, and most importantly, the most loved teacher in high school; perfect. Levi wasn't a man who would spend a lot of time in a woman's company, and he figured it was the reason he felt so frustrated by Mikasa's presence. When most of the women he'd met would look away from him, she didn't. She returned the exact same glare he aimed, and she wouldn't move her gaze away until the bell rang or Eren called her.

Petra, on the other hand, didn't look at him that way, but she'd smile and greet him when he passed by her classroom. She'd ask for his help to carry some boxes out of her car sometimes too, and she was the only teacher who ever talked to him so openly. There was Hanji as well, but she had a different way of treating him than Petra.

Levi wanted a distraction, no, he _needed_ it, and he believed that spending time with any other woman would be enough of a distraction for him, enough for those strange feelings to disappear and vanish for good. He didn't want to deal with them anymore. It was frustrating and confusing, and he hated feeling frustrated and confused about his own feelings.

He'd noticed slight changes in her for the last few days. She'd stare less at Eren, and spend a lot of time with her friend, Armin, or her classmate, Sasha. Something must have happened between them. Normally, Mikasa would be inseparable from Eren.

Only when he was passing by a couple of students did he hear about Eren dating one of the girls, whom he forgot her name anyway. _Was that it? So they weren't in love after all? What a relief!_ Indeed, he'd felt a rush of relief spread through him at the news, as if god above had given him a chance he didn't ask for in the first place. Confusion started to leak back into his mind, and to add up to it, Mikasa passed by, at that same moment, throwing a swift gaze at him, only for a smile to settle upon her pink, small lips. _Did she smile?_ He doubted his eyes.

During class, his heart would tremble uncontrollably at her presence. Sometimes he'd even forget what he was about to write on the board, and as a payback for making him forget, he'd call her to write herself, and occasionally Eren, who'd be distracted looking out the window or whispering something to Jean. He'd sit at his desk and she'd take the marker from his hand, fingers lightly brushing his in the process, and she'd start writing. He'd stare at her sneakily from the corner of his eyes, and at some point, he could see her glance at him too, which would double the speed his heartbeats were at. What a strange, yet a lovely feeling! Exciting and tempting, for each time he gazed at her he'd wonder whether she'd gaze back at him, as if it were some kind of a mind game.

So childish of him, definitely, but then again he never got to be childish even when he was a child.

"Is there something you want to say, Mikasa?" She had stopped by his desk after the bell rang. Everyone else left the classroom but the two of them, but she'd been silent for a couple of minutes now and he was growing impatient.

"Actually I was going to ask you the same thing, Mr. Levi." She responded, biting her lip before continuing, "You know… I've noticed a few things and…" His pulse raced with each word she said, and he was fighting to keep his calm in front of her, "You always stare at me and sometimes that makes me wonder… Am I doing something that is bothering you?"

"No, it's not that." He answered simply, leaving more room to other questions to invade her mind.

"So?" She insisted, "If you're not angry with me, then what's with all the staring?"

"Don't you have other classes to attend?" He was avoiding her question.

"It's break time, Mr. Levi." She said, reminding him of the fact that he seemingly forgot.

 _Shit!_ He cursed silently.

"I still have plenty of time to talk."

"Mr. Levi!" Petra suddenly called from the door, "I hope you're not busy…" She asked, her eyes on Mikasa.

"No, Ms. Ackerman was just about to leave." He said before pushing away from his chair, gathering his belongings, "Don't forget your homework, Ackerman, and study hard for the test tomorrow." He added before picking his bag and walking over to Petra.

"Are we ready to leave, then?" Petra inquired.

"Sure." Levi gave a nod as the two walked out of the classroom, leaving Mikasa inside.

His treatment made her blood boil, the way he decided to ignore her now of all times, after all the times she had caught him staring at her, and not just in the classroom. Sometimes even during the break, or when leaving the school grounds, he'd be around pretending to be preoccupied by other things, when his eyes would watch her secretly. She still managed to catch him eyeing her from afar a few times. She'd wondered what those gazes meant, why he was looking at her specifically, of all students. Something had changed, ever since that day he took her to his apartment, or had it always been like this and only now did she notice? Because her mind was no longer thinking about Eren, she managed to notice more things? And if that were the case, she wondered for how long now had he been watching her, for how long had he been sending her those curious gazes without her awareness?

She was starting to look at him more often; precisely just to note the number of times he'd glance at her a day, but recently she'd been staring at him because she wanted to, because she grew used to it and because every time she looked at him, she'd discover a new thing on him. He was actually really short, which she knew before, but didn't really pay attention to, but now that she noticed it again, she found it strangely adorable.

One time she shot him a glance, and he was running his palm over his dark hair, his bangs pushed back then falling on his forehead again, and her heart pumped at the beauty that displayed in front of her. He usually wore a grumpy face, a scary one, or so most of the students thought, but she realized that his eyes were actually pretty. They were narrow, half-lidded, which made his stare all the more compelling. She couldn't tell exactly what color they were, and she found it strange that she hadn't noticed that yet, but perhaps taking a closer look at him sometime would be nice. One day she saw him carrying a few boxes to his car, his sleeves were rolled up, which gave her eyes access to see his muscled arms, and she wondered if he exercised often at the gym. She wondered if she'd ever meet him by accident there if she decided to go as well.

He was her teacher, but she was allowed to think like that about him. She wouldn't be the only student on earth who had a crush on her teacher, although having a crush on him, specifically; she must be the first one.

And she wished it only stopped at that, but lately her eyes would land on places she'd rather not stare at in public, in front of all her classmates. Eren had once caught her staring at him, and she prayed for dear god he hadn't noticed where she was looking. She was caught off guard by the way his lips moved as he explained the lesson to them, and she knew he noticed her glancing at him but she could care less. Eren had been the only boy who kissed her, and when she thought about it, she wasn't sure whether to call it a kiss or not, since he was thinking of someone else while he kissed her, but she did wonder what it would feel like if she kissed someone other than Eren, someone like, say, Levi. That was wrong, so wrong to think about and she knew, but it wasn't like she would kiss him anyway, so it wouldn't hurt to think about it, right?

Perhaps in her dreams she would.

Oh, speaking of dreams

Her dreams normally revolved around Eren, nothing sweet or happy, just plain nightmares of him shutting her down, rejecting her feelings and turning his back on her, which he did, in the end. But now her dreams focused more on something entirely different. After having spent a long day staring at her teacher, in her sleep she'd finally get the opportunity to do more than just staring. She'd see herself holding his hand, tracing his well-defined jaw with the tip of her finger, messing his soft, shadowy hair up and watching what expression he'd make closely. Her recent dreams, however, were beyond just fluffy moments she shared with her teacher. It started by making out on his desk, to touching him inappropriately, and she'd wake up in the middle of the night panting, half-satisfied and half-frustrated. After all, he was her teacher and she was his student, and as far as her dreams could go, sharing such moments with him would get her in big trouble.

Oh, she'd lied about it to Eren already, and she hadn't told him it was a lie, yet. She wondered if it would even be a lie when she'd finally decide to tell him. She was fantasizing about her teacher anyway, and in her dreams, she slept with him already.

A part of her refused to tell Eren it was a lie, just to see what sort of expression he'd make when their teacher was around, but a part of her also didn't want to tell him, because she loved the idea of having something going with her teacher. As wrong as it sounded, she liked it, because it was risky, challenging, all the things she was down for. It wouldn't really be a problem for her to try and approach her teacher as more than just his clever student. Those stares he aimed at her often must mean there is something going in his mind about her, or how she liked to assume anyway. But if she were to really make a move, it would probably be easy enough. Levi surely looked like the inapproachable, tough kind of guy, but he also used foul language around her, and it didn't seem like he was one to hold back from something he wanted, because she believed he wanted _her_.

But she wouldn't try something before making sure what all those glances were about, and what other way could she know other than just straight up ask him? It didn't really make her feel nervous, hesitant, or anything of that sort. She never was hesitant about things that involved what almost everyone else was intimidated by. Most of her classmates wouldn't dare say a word back to their teacher—no, they wouldn't even dare look directly into his eyes, but she did and she enjoyed every bit of it. She'd love to see what he was going to do to her for such behaviors, but he normally just brushed it off, shot her a couple of glares before turning to write on the board. His lips at a point would part, as if he would say something to her, but they'd shut instantly.

Did she intimidate him?

Or was it that she was really special to him that he'd blind himself from the rebellious manners she maintained around him?

Both would be nice, in all honesty.

She'd decided that once all the students were out, she'd stay and talk to him, ask him if there was a reason as to why he always looked at her the way he did, but he refused to answer her, and even looked for a way out. He was lucky—too lucky Ms. Ral, their art teacher, arrived, and he used that chance to run away without giving her a proper answer.

So there really was something, something rather more than just glaring at the student who'd talk back to him. He wasn't really good at hiding it, because if it had been otherwise, he would have been more direct with her, which he wasn't, much to her satisfaction. How fun it would be to mess around and see him get all flustered and confused, embarrassed and clueless because he was but a fool, old man who could be serious and wear a grumpy face all while doing his job, but become clumsy when someone tried to dig into the depth of his heart.

_So he had a heart after all!_

Of course he did. He was only human, one who didn't grow up as a kid should. He wasn't taught how to express his feelings, or deal with them. He wasn't taught how to be a gentleman and impress women. The little things he learned were the basics that one needed to know in order to live independently. He was taught how to cook, how to do laundry, how to cut his hair on his own, how to drive a car, how to read and how to fight to defend himself. But no one ever taught him about love, and how confusing it was, or how insecure it would make him feel, despite being at this age. He wasn't taught what love was, that he couldn't even tell if he were in love. He knew it wasn't a lustful desire at least, for he never really had inappropriate thoughts about her; if anything, just a chance to stroke her hair or maybe her cheek, but nothing more. Her presence alone was enough. Seeing her attending his class and sitting in her place was satisfying and he wouldn't ask for more. Talking to her was too much, especially when it didn't involve things in relation to math. But as much as he hated all those weird feelings he'd get when talking to her, he loved them at the same time, because only she could make him feel that way.

He'd seen her sitting with Armin during the break. Petra had forgotten to bring a book and he had to wait for her while she went to get it. And as usual, his eyes searched around for her. The way she'd made his heart pound just moments ago, only thinking about it made his heart race even faster. He'd seen Eren approaching them, it was about time that idiot apologized to his friends, and he'd seen them hugging for a while. Petra didn't take too long before she arrived, and she was carrying some boxes with her. He'd thought she forgot a book! But he offered her help anyways. Her car was being fixed and thus she asked him if he could drive her home on his way since they'd both leave at the same time today, and he couldn't say no. She'd been nice to him and that was the least thing he could do to thank her. And he even owed her one, for she was the one to help him get out of the maddening situation Mikasa was putting him in.

For once, he didn't want to face reality. For once, it scared him, confused him, and he was at loss for words. He was caught, and she of all people noticed. Of course she noticed; it wasn't really something he worked hard to hide. He didn't even try to hide it, for he knew she was normally too busy with Eren to even notice him glancing at her more than she'd know. But he'd also noticed how she changed. How she wasn't around Eren as much, how she wasn't so sad or upset anymore, and how now, even she started returning those curious gazes at him.

When he got back home that day, he had a quick meal and a shower, then sat on the couch where she had fallen asleep once before, and he'd thought what things would be like if she were to lie on the couch beside him now, resting her head in his lap while he stroked her hair to sleep. The chances of her coming to his place anymore were so low if not nonexistent. But he'd enjoyed her presence at his place anyway, even if it would never happen again.

* * *

"You look so lost." Armin pointed out, sneaking a suspicious peek at Mikasa over his book, "Are you sick?"

"No". She answered.

Eren put his own book down and glanced up at her, "You've been doing that a lot, you know; losing yourself in thought." And he gave her a look as if trying to tell her he knew what it was all about.

"I'm just… I'm a bit tired. That's all." She explained, in hopes for them to believe her, or at least Armin, since Eren knew better not to.

"You know, there are a couple of things that could make you so absent-minded. You either did something wrong and you're thinking how to fix it before anybody notices, or…" Armin paused.

"Or…?" She insisted for him to continue.

"You're in love." He finished and the way her eyes widened said enough to him.

Eren, however, sent her a pointed look. As much as he loved her, he really hated knowing that she had a thing going with their teacher. It was so wrong, so wrong and he couldn't possibly stay silent about it forever.

"Which one is it then, Mikasa?" Armin broke the silence, and she looked him in the eyes, hesitant about answering.

 _Both._ She wanted to say, but she wasn't sure about her own feelings, whether she really was in love, for all she'd be thinking about were naked pictures of her teacher. She was more or less lusting for him, but wouldn't really call it love. "It's neither." She finally answered, and she wasn't practically lying either. She wasn't in love, and she didn't do anything nasty, at least not yet.

"So I'm wrong? Weird! I wonder what's keeping your mind busy then." He smiled faintly, hoping he'd get an answer but she only lowered her head and looked at her book.

"You guys, we have a math test tomorrow. We shouldn't be wasting our time." Eren snapped suddenly, "Mr. Levi will kick all of us out of his class if we fail."

"Speak for yourself, Eren." Mikasa huffed, her dark irises eyeing him coldly between thin lashes.

"She's right! Mikasa and I aren't the ones having trouble solving math problems, Eren." Armin seconded her statement, more or less trying to tease his friend.

"Then why don't you both shut the fuck up and help me study. What the hell kind of friends are you, making fun of me?" Eren furrowed his brows at the two of them in irritation.

"Well, for one, we had to wait for almost two hours before you arrived because you had to go out with Annie, so it isn't really our fault." Mikasa shot, arms crossed against her chest.

"I wonder what you were doing for two hours." Armin mumbled, and Eren's face turned bloody red instantly, "Was it your first time?"

"The hell are you talking about? We were watching a movie, I told you!" Eren shouted in defense.

"We're supposed to be studying but we're doing something entirely else. You were supposed to watch a movie, and you could have ended up doing something else as well." Armin implied, and Eren's blush darkened, "So long as you use protection, I don't really see a problem, unless you guys haven't planned for it."

"I can't believe we're talking about this. I thought we were _friends_." Eren rested his face on the table, dropping the pen and sighing deeply.

"Sorry, I'm just teasing you. Don't get mad, Eren." Armin said, patting his friend's back.

"I hate you." The boy said, though didn't actually mean those words.

"Alright, seriously, now we shouldn't waste our time. Let's help Eren with his struggle a bit." Mikasa suggested, and Armin nodded.

"About damn time you remembered to help me." Eren finally lifted his head off the table, pen in his hand again.

"Here, give me your notebook. I'll show you!" Armin held his hand out, but Eren kept his notebook away.

"No way! I'm going to try and solve the problems on my own. You just tell me if I got the results right or wrong." Eren said with an insisting tone.

"Yes, but if I don't show you the correct way to solve the problems then…"

"I'll figure it on my own." He insisted still.

"What do you need our help for then?" Armin sighed, his hand retreating. He should have gotten used to Eren's hot-headedness by now.

"Just do as I say, okay? _Please?_ " He begged in a pleading tone, and both Mikasa and Armin eyed each other as if they had just lost a fight. He always used that tone to convince them with whatever he had in mind, and it _always_ worked on them.

"Okay, fine. Do ask if you don't understand something, though." Mikasa warned him.

"I will, thanks guys!" He smiled and looked down at his notebook, so determined to solve the problems he'd been struggling with for an hour now, yet not planning on giving up any time soon.

"Kids, what do you want for dinner?" Carla entered the room suddenly, a big smile upon her lips as she watched the friends studying together.

"Mac and cheese." Eren answered.

"Well, I was thinking maybe your friend Armin would pick, since he's the guest here." The mother replied, looking over at Armin.

"A-Ah, thank you, aunt Carla, but I'm fine with anything. Your food's always delicious and reminds me with my mother's." Armin said shyly.

"I'm flattered. So Mac and cheese it is?" She asked again to confirm, and all three of them nodded, "Alright. Dinner will be ready soon! Study well, kids!" She turned around and left, closing the door behind her.

"When are your parents coming back, by the way?" Mikasa inquired, looking at Armin.

"In roughly two months, I guess. It's not bad living with my grandpa, though, and if they're having a good time, they can stay away as much as they want so long as they don't forget they have a son." Armin chuckled.

"But no one can ever replace your parents." Mikasa said in almost a whisper, and Eren and Armin's gazes fixed on her immediately. "I need to go to the bathroom. Excuse me." She put her pen down and stood up, leaving the room in a rush.

"That's right. Her parents' anniversary is next month, isn't it?" Armin asked, seeming to understand why Mikasa had said that.

"Yeah… I almost forgot. If I say something stupid to her, you'd better tell me so I can apologize." Eren said with a very serious tone.

"Don't worry, I will." Armin reassured him with a smile. "What do you say if we go out together this weekend, just the three of us? We can try and cheer her up a bit." He suggested.

"That sounds cool. We can do that. But first, we'd better pass that math test tomorrow." Eren went back to focus on the problem he was solving, and so did Armin after him.

* * *

Tomorrow came sooner than expected. Stress was written over most of the students' faces, some were determined, however, like Eren, who had been studying for the test so hard, and some weren't really concerned for it, like Mikasa and Armin.

Levi walked by the desks, handing the students their papers, his eyes entertained by all those terrified expressions almost everyone was making, their hands shaking as they proceeded to grab the paper and read it, and as usual, only one student wore a dull expression, Mikasa.

She leaned against her seat, arms and legs crossed, dark eyes staring into his, a few strands of hair falling over them, and that beautiful image blinded him from seeing Connie's foot stretching underneath his desk, and he tripped, accidentally dropping the rest of the papers he was holding. Luckily he managed to balance himself in time, though the subjects scattered on the floor, and everyone stared at him awkwardly.

His glare turned to Connie then, who was trembling in utter horror, "Springer!" his tone was loud, and Connie could swear demonic flames were glowing in his eyes, "Perhaps you'd like to stretch your legs on your way out of my class."

"I'm so sorry, Mr. Levi." Connie got up from his chair and held his hand out to grab the scattered papers all over the floor, "Please forgive me! I didn't get enough sleep last night because I was studying. Please don't kick me out."

"Back to your seat." He sent him a threatening glare and the boy retreated, sitting back on his chair. He then sighed and turned to see the entire class eyeing him, and he huffed, his glare sharpening, "If you're staring at me, it better be because my face has the answers to your test." He shouted at the students and they all buried their eyes back into their papers as he leaned down to gather the scattered ones, and as his hand reached to pick another one, he saw someone's hand reach to it before his, and when he looked up, it was hers.

She sat in front of him, picking the dispersed papers on the floor, and the way her hair kept falling to her front was distracting him. He'd try so hard to look away, to ignore how pretty she was in that uniform of hers. It was the same uniform every other girl at high school wore, but it looked so beautiful on her. His hand reached to pick the last paper, only for hers to grab the other end of it, and they sat there as their gazes joined, staring at each other in complete silence. She decided to let go of it and hand him the ones she gathered, and he took them, the two of them standing up. "Thanks." He murmured.

"No problem." And she answered, returning to her seat.

Levi continued to lend the rest of students their papers, now trying harder not to lose his focus, and once he was done, he returned to his desk and sat down on his chair, watching the students. Everyone was concentrated on solving the subject and they couldn't possibly get the chance to look around them. They were way too occupied to even have time for that, which assured him, for he could stare at Mikasa all he wanted.

She'd press the pen to her lips, roll it in between them, and then bite it so lightly before she wrote her answer down. Her hair kept falling on her eyes every time she leaned down to write something, and she ended up pulling a hair-band and tying back her hair into a ponytail, and how gorgeously stunning did it make her look, such a pleasant view to his eyes. She looked up at him upon feeling his gaze on her, only for him to look away, his eyes then spotting Sasha attempting to copy Connie's answers, "Oi, Braus!" He got up and walked over to the two, "Might as well leave your paper blank and let me answer it for you."

"No, no, I'm so sorry Mr. Levi. Please forgive me I won't do it again." She spoke in a freaked-out tone, shaking and trembling with closed eyes.

He was going to kick her out; both Sasha and Connie, for the two were getting on his last nerve. But his glare softened inexplicably, and he refrained from doing so. Instead, he took a deep breath in, "This is your last warning."

"Yes, thank you very much Mr. Levi. You're so kind." The girl sobbed in relief then went back to read the test subject.

The rest of the class passed in silence.

* * *

"Were you two out of your fucking minds? You decided to cheat during not any exam but math? Mr. Levi could have kicked you both out and called your parents for all we know. You're so dumb." Jean reproached Sasha and Connie after the test was over. "He could've gotten you expelled!"

"I told her it was a bad idea but she wouldn't listen to me." Connie explained, denying any responsibility in what happened.

"He wasn't even looking at us. He was looking at Mikasa and I thought I could copy a few answers before he wakes up from his daydreams." The girl rambled aimlessly, and Eren who was standing nearby heard what she said, his attention then turned to the conversation.

"Why the fuck would Mr. Levi be watching Mikasa? She's one of the best students. He wouldn't need to worry about her trying to cheat. Clearly he was just fooling you to see whether you'd try to cheat or not. As expected, you fell for it. You always do. Is there nothing inside your head but food, jeez?" Jean kept on scolding Sasha and admonishing her for her stupid actions.

Eren, on the other hand, also had something going in his mind. He'd seen the way those two looked at each other while everyone else was busy with their test. When she got up of her seat and went to help him pick up the papers. He'd seen those sneaky gazes Levi was sending her, and then how they both took a long moment of staring into each other's eyes before they decided to stand up and break it off.

He'd seen all of it happen in front of him, and he hated every bit of it to the fullest. He almost snapped at Mikasa at that moment, but he held himself back from committing such a foolish thing in front of everyone. He could get both of them in trouble for all he knew, and he didn't want to. It actually reminded him. Where was Mikasa? He didn't see her leave the classroom. He'd been in a rush to leave to get some fresh air after that stressful test, and he'd waited for neither Mikasa nor Armin. But he'd seen Armin talking to Marco earlier, yet Mikasa was nowhere to be found.

"Left your mind back in class?" Annie's voice suddenly interrupted his thoughts, making him forget what he was even thinking about.

"Annie, hey!" He leaned down and planted a kiss to her lips. "How are you?"

"I'm good. How was your test?" She asked as they started walking in the hallway.

"Mind-wrecking, seriously. But I did my best. I hope it was enough." He stretched a bit to get rid of the stress.

"You studied with your friends, didn't you? I'm sure Mikasa and Armin helped you enough." She knew they were both great students. Eren wasn't bad either, but Math wasn't exactly his strongest subject.

"Yeah, we ended up talking about meaningless things most of the time and barely studied as much as we planned." He sighed, remembering yesterday's events.

"Really?" She raised a brow at him, a bit curious as to what they were possibly talking about.

"Yeah, it was funny. You know how we watched that movie, yesterday? Well, Armin was somehow convinced that we were doing something entirely else." He shook his head at his friend's crazy ideas.

"Doing what?" She questioned, now more curious to know.

"Well, you know…" But he didn't seem to be able to say it.

"I don't. That's why I'm asking you, dumbass." She sent him a pointed look and he blushed.

"He… He thought we were doing… ' _that_ '…" His response was still vague, although she seemed to understand what he meant.

"'That' hm, that gives an endless amount of things we could have been doing. I could have been kicking your ass for one." She decided to tease him into saying it, instead.

"Annie, you know exactly what I mean…" He frowned a bit at her.

"Still won't be sure I got it right until you tell me." Her shoulders shrugged, intimidating, blue eyes fixed to his big, turquoise ones.

"He thought we were having sex. There. I said it. Happy?" He spat it out at last with an angrily shy voice, and she smirked.

"And how did you feel about your friend thinking we were having sex?" She followed with the questions, making him wonder where she was going with all of this.

"Well, I…" he was embarrassed, for sure, but not that he would admit it. "I don't know." He huffed.

Her brow rose in interest at his reply, "Wouldn't you be embarrassed if your friend knew we had sex if we actually did?"

"I… No. I wouldn't be embarrassed." He claimed with a convincingly, confident tone, "I just… I never really thought about it?"

"Never thought about what? Your friends knowing we had sex, or us having sex?" She felt the heat spreading from his body as his cheeks burned in an adorably, pink blush.

"Both. Why are we talking about this now… and here?" he was flustered, but most of all irritated by the sneaky ears listening to their conversation.

She gazed at him with questioning eyes, "Are you saying you wouldn't want to?"

"I didn't say that." He justified defensively, "I just didn't think you would want to." A hand rested on the back of his head as proceeded to explain with a much calmer voice, "We haven't been dating for that long and… I wouldn't really mind if we waited a bit more until we get to know each other better…"

A relaxed sigh left her mouth, "But would you want to?"

His eyes locked into hers, silence tying them both into the moment as they gazed into each other's eyes. A soft smile formed across his face as he answered tenderly, "Of course I would."

"What a perv!" the girl simply snapped and proceeded to walk away, breaking their eye-contact.

"H-huh?" she left him dumbfounded. _So that was her plan with all those questions!_ "Wait, Annie!"

* * *

Temptation and need filled dark eyes as they traveled up and down the figure sitting across from her. While everyone else picked their bags and left the classroom, she simply sat there, stealing a few more gazes at ease, as everyone was too exhausted after that test to even notice where her eyes were going.

She'd remembered how he'd refused to talk to her yesterday. How he'd simply left her alone and went with the art teacher. She didn't want to hate her art teacher. That woman was so nice to everyone, but she still hated seeing her around him, even if she were just a friend to him. Perhaps she'd need to claim a place in his heart before anyone else would. Perhaps she'd _have_ to.

She removed her hair-band, shook her head a bit as her hair spread around her shoulders, and she noted how he shot her a very quick glance. She stood up, hanging her backpack over her shoulder as she walked over to him.

"I assume you don't have time to talk today either, do you?" She crossed her arms against the wooden surface of his desk, looking down at him.

He didn't bother to look back, only fixed his eyes on the paper he was holding and spoke, "Make it quick."

"Well, you see. It's up to you to make it quick or not. You didn't answer my question so technically it's your turn." Her tone was playfully serious, and he made the effort to look at her now.

"What exactly do you want me to say?" his brows were furrowed, drawing an interesting line across his forehead.

She gave him an indifferent shrug of her shoulders, "I just want to know why you keep staring at me. That's all."

He placed the paper he was holding down. He never really grasped what was written on it, only used it to distract himself until she was out f his sight. His back pressed against his chair as he eyed her darkly, "I could say the same thing back at you, Mikasa. I've noticed."

 _Oh?_ Her brow rose, and so did her curiosity, "What else did you notice?"

"You know, this isn't the way you talk to your teacher." He decided to keep his tone contained, despite his desperate need to soften it as he spoke to her, "If people heard you, they might start getting the wrong idea."

So he was playing dirty, now, firing at her with her very own words. She merely smirked at his statement, "Or perhaps they'd be getting the right idea. After all, that's not the way a teacher looks at his student."

There was silence then and for a second, his mind going blank. Nothing came up for him to say in return, defend himself and prove her wrong. She was right. It wasn't a proper way for him to look at her, and he probably shouldn't even be looking at her now for she looked intolerably stunning and each time a thought crossed his mind to say, he'd forget. And there he was now, the girl who made his world stop, who made his heart beat faster than it ever had, who made his thoughts mix and clutter, the only girl who made him feel so many different things stood before him, waiting for him to tell her about it all. But she already knew, and he knew it too.

He knew that she felt the same things for him. He could have her all right now. He could end his struggle at this moment and confess everything to her. It would sound wrong, but he had a feeling she wouldn't reject him or push him away, and he wasn't sure if that was what he wanted. If she did welcome him, if she truly did return those feelings, wouldn't it still be wrong for them to indulge in such things? And so a part of him, just a tiny part who still had a bit of maturity and conscience hoped for her to shut him down and reject him. But he wouldn't risk it, whether she'd reject him or not, he would never be the one to initiate it. Silence was the best choice he could ever make right now. He didn't need to make a decision.

"You're a smart girl, Mikasa. Don't waste your time with someone like me." And he finally spoke, words bitter but honest. He only wished her well, and he couldn't value himself as good enough for her. He wasn't as beautiful and young as she was. He didn't have a whole new life waiting for him. He didn't want to take her future away out of selfish reasons, to take a future he probably wouldn't live long to see it.

"I'm a smart girl, Mr. Levi…" She answered, the rest of her words stuck at the edge of her tongue, for a moment, making every second more tempting, "If I walk away now, that will be the biggest waste of my time."

And her words spun him like a windstorm, as if he were hung upside-down then thrown back onto his feet, and he was more tempted than ever to tell her, tell her the things she wanted to hear, the things he wanted her to hear, the things she already heard every time she looked into his eyes and he looked into hers. It was forbidden, so forbidden and wrong and only thinking about it was a sin. But for her, he could be the biggest sinner.

He could be, but he wouldn't, still. And all of the words that threatened to slip for him were held back. In no way would he allow her to mess him up more than she already had, and he seemed to be succeeding, for she looked down and turned away, walking to the door. He watched her and almost called her to stay, to try a bit more, perhaps he'd end up telling her, but he stayed still and only watched, letting such a glorious chance slip from him, or perhaps it wasn't a chance? Perhaps she was only testing him? He didn't want to know, either way. He'd hate to know. And he stood up, about to walk to over to the window, only for him to hear the door shut. He looked behind and he saw her there, leaning against the closed door, her hand hiding behind her back and held onto the knob before she pushed off of it and walked straight up to him.

He couldn't understand the process of the situation. All of a sudden she was pulling at his collar, bringing him in for a kiss she didn't hesitate to force upon his lips. He couldn't breathe, and it felt as if she just sucked out all of the air from his lungs. It choked him, but in a surprisingly good way, and his eyes had widened in response to the sudden contact she made, but closed after a couple of seconds.

For the first time in his life he felt so _weak_. His control got lost in the middle of that kiss that melted every bit of his lips. His body became a puppet in her hands, allowing her to do to him as she pleased. He was out of all and every urge to stop her, push her away and scold her for crossing the boundaries so recklessly. Instead, he relished in the moment, savoring the sweet taste of her tender lips.

The weight of being a responsible adult was shook off his chest, experiencing for the first time what it felt like to let someone take charge of the situation, without having to worry about making a choice he'd regret, simply because he didn't make the choice. Because he was a human and he could make mistakes too, and there was someone out there who wouldn't hate him for his mistakes.

Because he was a human, he was committing a mistake by not trying to stop her.

_To be continued._

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading. I hope the events aren't moving that fast for some of you. I also want to include more of EreAni in this fanfic, as well as other (possibly one-sided) pairings and whatnot. Just a little heads for you to know what's coming. I'm a multi-shipper myself, but I know some of you aren't, so I apologize if you're only here for a specific pairing.
> 
> Again, thank you for reading and being patient with my slow-ass updates.


	5. Chapter IV: Jumbled

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello everyone! Hope you didn't wait so long for an update. I tried to make this as fast as I could!
> 
> I would like to address a quick thank you to everyone who supported me, especially the lovely people on tumblr. You're all really amazing, and it warms my heart to see you guys enjoy reading my work, supporting me through the process, reviewing it, telling me which moments you loved reading, or what you're looking forward to. It's all greatly appreciated and it's what keeps me going.
> 
> Without further ado, let's proceed with this!

**FORBIDDEN**

* * *

CHAPTER IV: _Jumbled_

He was doing it again; pushing her away with every word he spoke, but she was standing at a point where she could understand this tactic he used. His eyes betrayed his mouth, for no matter how harsh his words were, his gazes were no match to them, just pure softness and warmth spilling out of them. And perhaps his last statement proved her point even more, for his voice had softened, and her heart had throbbed uncontrollably at that.

 _You're a smart girl, Mikasa. Don't waste your time with someone like me._ She replayed those words in her head over and over as she turned around, halfway through giving up on her plan to get him to confess.

He was scared, she could tell, hesitant about making the first move. She couldn’t blame him, really. How risky would it be if some student or teacher heard their conversation? The risk was undeniable, being in the school grounds.

Getting him in trouble wasn’t her aim; that was unquestionable. But with every step she made to that door, as the distance seemed to grow bigger than it actually was, she hoped he’d change his mind. Her patience ran out when her tempting gazes didn’t seem to have any sort of effect on him, and she thought maybe he’d stop her before she’d leave the classroom, like in those good, old romance movies. But she was standing at the door by then, and nothing happened.

Maybe he wasn’t ready. Maybe he needed time. Maybe she was wrong about her assumptions. Maybe he was right about what he said.

 _No_ , she paused. She couldn’t find it in her heart to back down so easily, to let the couple of words he tossed at her shake her confidence. She couldn’t possibly let him decide what was and wasn’t good for her. If it wasn’t him she wanted, she’d have to figure it out on her own instead of letting him decide that for her. And she let the strap of her backpack slip down her arm, placing it on one of the desks as she held the knob with her other hand, closing the door slowly. She pressed her back to it, gathering the courage in her heart. What she was about to do could either solve everything or bring nothing but complete chaos. And when their eyes met again, he was standing a few steps away from the window.

Without wasting another second, her fast, confident steps led her back to him. His lips were her only target, and she was thankful to god above he was shorter than her, for it made it easier for her to simply grab him by the collar and force a kiss on him.

She felt him stiffen, and she made sure to tighten her grip around his collar so as to prevent him from pulling away so soon. She’d need all the time she could have to taste him, understand exactly what those feelings she had for him meant. And for a second there, a really quick one, she felt him relax. His guards were down, and it gave her the pleasure of enjoying the kiss instead of focusing on maintaining it.

The softness of his lips smoldered hers lusciously, and she parted them just enough to wrap them back around his upper lip. But she lost that pleasure when she sensed his long fingers wrap around her hands tightly, his thumbs trying to unfold her grips from around his collar as he pulled away. And once the kiss was broken, he took a couple of steps back.

Her arms dropped to her sides, watching the interesting, shocked expression he still wore before his brows furrowed again, drawing an angry portrait on his face to conceal what other emotions could possibly rise behind it.

His lips parted to take in a short breath before he snapped at her, “Have you lost your fucking mind?” his eyes instantly stared into the windows, his heart beating fast at the thought of someone having possibly seen what happened. “Do you have any damn idea how much trouble you could’ve gotten us into if someone saw us?” he turned to her again to scold her, “Do you even realize what you just did?”

“I just wanted to check how low I’d need to bow for our heights to match.” Her voice was composed, and she calmly pushed her bangs behind her ear with her fingertips. “Apparently I miscalculated it.”

 _She damn sure did!_ “No. You kissed your goddamn teacher.” He raged, “Ackerman, I’ll be kind and pretend this never happened. Now get the hell out.”

Her eyes narrowed at him, loving the flustered stare he was giving her, the subtle trembling in his voice as he failed so miserably to sound ruthless, “Is the air getting heavy for you? Your face looks red.”

His glare darkened, wiping away the flush of red on his cheeks within an instant, “You should be grateful I’m not reporting your ass to the principal.” The smirk that lay between her lips pissed him off. Pride tainted every inch of her dark-lashed eyes, and he couldn’t allow her to overpower him, not twice in a row. “It’s a shame your parents didn’t teach you how to draw the line between you and your teachers.”

Something in her eyes changed instantly the moment those words fell from his mouth. Her lips parted, a silent gasp of air being sucked in as her eyes widened, a hint of sadness seeping into them. She lowered her head, her bangs falling again to her front, but her frown was still noticeable to him. Her lips curled down, dim eyes fixed to the ground in shame as she spoke, bitterly and wretchedly, “My parents are dead…”

 _Oh!_ His glare died right away upon hearing that fresh fact. And he threw silent curses at himself, biting hard on his bottom lip. Before he could say anything to her, she stormed out of the classroom, leaving him with nothing but guilt devouring his chest.

 

 

* * *

 There she was! Eren’s eyes popped open slightly wide upon finally spotting Mikasa walk out of the classroom, and she didn’t look so happy. He was at least sure it wasn’t because she messed up the test. Her figure reflected on his turquoise eyes as they followed her, saw her rush through the hallway almost blindly, accidentally bumping into Jean, but not even pausing to apologize to the boy. Something must have happened! Did she perhaps argue with her _‘boyfriend’_? He silently hoped so. Maybe they finally came to their senses and broke it off.

“If you’re going to keep looking around like that, maybe I should leave.” Annie’s voice broke through his thoughts.

He glanced down at her and shook his head, “No, it’s not… Sorry. It’s just that…” _My adoptive sister is sleeping with our Math teacher and I don’t know what the fuck to do about it!_ He wanted to tell her—he needed to tell somebody. How could he possibly keep hiding that? He felt guilty even if he had no hand in it. “Say, Annie… if…” his gaze lowered softly, “If someone you cared about was… doing something wrong, that could eventually get them in trouble… _really big_ trouble… you’d try to stop them, right?”

She looked into his eyes inquisitively, wondering what it was all about. Eren wasn’t someone who’d get his nose up people’s business, and she guessed this must be a really important matter to him. Her arms crossed against her chest as she thought for a second, “I’d beat their ass until they’re convinced to stop.” Not that it had worked on him, though.

“Oh?” he arched his brows in uncertainty, “What if they’re the ones who’ll beat your ass if you try to convince them, though?”

“Eren…” Annie let out a soft sigh, and he eyed her curiously with big eyes, “Do you remember what I did when you kissed me back in the gym?”

His thick brows furrowed, and his eye twitched at the memory before he answered, “You _punched_ me. I felt like my guts were about to spill out of my mouth.”

“And what did you do after?” she dropped her arms to her sides and bantered, “Did that make you back down?”

No, certainly not, for his determination to prove himself to her gave him the power to endure any sort of physical pain he’d have to go through. But Mikasa… he’d hurt her before, and he wasn’t sure he had any right to decide for her what relationship she could have and with whom. He would’ve probably still hated it if she’d dated Jean instead, but still, that wouldn’t have been half as bad as dating their _teacher_. Just, _what the fuck was wrong with her?_

“Let’s go grab lunch together…” Eren snapped out of his thinking and decided to give more attention to his girlfriend before she’d beat his ass again in front of everybody. His hand took hers, fingers intertwined as he proceeded to walk.

She walked with him, her eyes on him as she sensed his growing concern. “Mikasa isn’t dumb like you, Eren.” Annie said, and he paused at her words, “Whatever it is she’s doing, she knows what she’s up for, unlike you, who act without consideration of the possible consequences.”

He shot her a questioning glance and resumed walking, dragging her across the hallway with him. “Since when did you know Mikasa so well?”

“Since—” she was about to answer, when her attention was suddenly driven elsewhere, and her words caught in her throat. She looked to her right, where Armin stood with Marco, and he was staring at her with an inexplicable frown. His gaze immediately averted away once meeting hers.

“Since?” Eren turned to look at her when she went silent, and he saw her look behind for a couple of seconds before fixing her gaze on him again. His eyes briefly scanned the crowded hallway, trying to point where her eyes were going just then, and he saw Armin glance over at them in half a second.

“Since we started taking PE together…” Annie finally finished her words, “Even if she doesn’t think it through, she always knows how to make the right move.”

Eren decided to ignore that and carry on with the conversation, looking ahead of him as he sighed, “Yeah, well, she still got her ankle sprained that one time, though.”

“People make mistakes, even the most talented.” She said, and he let those words sink in for a little while.

If even talented people could make mistakes, how could he be sure that Mikasa wasn’t making one?

“As far as mistakes go, I’m sure Mikasa isn’t doing something horrible that deserves to make a fuss about.” Annie added to reassure the overly-concerned Eren, “What could she possibly be doing? Sleeping with a teacher, perhaps?” she mused.

Eren’s heart skipped a beat, almost choking on his own breaths. _Fuck!_ He gulped, his hand squeezing hers a little, “You know what? You’re right. It’s nothing she can’t get out of.” He should probably just stop drawing unwanted attention. He could be the one to put Mikasa in trouble if anything. “What do you say we go out this weekend?” he changed the subject.

“Sounds fine by me.” She nodded at him, and he met her with a smile.

 

 

* * *

 “Mikasa!” Sasha walked into the girls’ bathroom after having her lunch, and she found the girl standing by the sink, seemingly lost in deep thoughts. “Did you do well in the test?”

Sasha’s voice didn’t seem to reach Mikasa, however. It almost felt as if the world around her no longer existed, for she got lost in an endless flashback of the stupid mistake she committed.

His words had _hurt_ her, saddened her. She _hated_ him, and she regretted having dared to kiss him even. It made her feel frustrated and humiliated. How was she going to look him in the eyes now? How stupid of her to think she could have what she wanted that easy!

“I’m so glad Mr. Levi didn’t punish me and Connie for what we did.” Sasha continued to ramble, trying to get the girl’s attention, and she noted how her eyes twitched at the mention of Levi. “He was staring at you for so long and I thought it was a glorious chance for me to make a move. It was funny; if I didn’t know better, I’d say he has a crush on you.” The girl said jokingly, chuckling innocently at her own statement, but she swallowed her laugh when Mikasa turned to look at her at last, and she looked as if she were ready to take her soul and sacrifice it to the devils. “Um, I’m just kidding. Sorry, that wasn’t a very appropriate thing for me to say.”

But Mikasa merely frowned and tucked her backpack around her shoulder as she walked out of the bathroom in silence.

After all it _was_ a mistake, making such a dangerous move so early. She shouldn’t have allowed her impatience to get the best of her. She should have waited, given him time to consider his own feelings. Perhaps she surprised him and his reaction wasn’t what he intended it to be. But being patient was simply not how she rolled. Impetuosity had always been her key to everything, something she now thought she should change.

She didn’t cry that night when she got home. She wouldn’t let him make her cry, but she was upset, hurt, and she swore to get those thoughts out of her head, to just forget and never think back, no matter how hard it would be.

 

 

* * *

He lay on his couch, the test papers in his hand as his eyes skimmed through the answers and names. The more he read through the answers, the more he questioned his life choices and the value of his existence in this world. He was no longer sure whether he couldn’t get the message across, or his students were just plain idiots. Only when he got to Armin’s paper did his glare vanish, a satisfied smile settling on his lips.

The boy was a natural, he thought. It was thanks to students like him that he had a reason to carry on with his job. He spent quarter the time he’d need to spend with most students’ papers to put the final grade; _‘A+’_ was marked on Armin’s paper before he added it to the ones he’d finished grading.

He went through a couple more before pausing once Mikasa’s name appeared. A light sigh escaped through his parting lips, and every muscle in his face relaxed, his expression softening at the mere lettering of her name.

He was having a hard time wrapping his head around what happened today. He sought distractions, and he drank three cups of tea to bring himself to focus before he started grading the test papers, the fourth cup was carefully placed on the table by the couch in case his mind started drifting away again.

She _kissed_ him, and he could practically still sense the force at which her lips pressed to his. It was so real and not at the same time; it almost felt like that moment when one was stuck between a dream and reality. At this point he was no longer sure how he truly felt about that kiss.

He’d been mistaken, falling for her like a fool, although he’d hated to label himself as such, for only a fool wouldn’t fall for her. Eren was the biggest one, probably. But he was grateful to him in so many ways. Had it not been for Eren’s ignorance, and inconsideration of the girl’s feelings, he wouldn’t have brought her to his apartment that day. Had it not been for Eren rejecting her, he wouldn’t have managed to plant the courage in her heart to get over him. Had it not been for Eren being a big moron who constantly hurt her, she wouldn’t have kissed him today. And as grateful as he was to that fact, he was also unthankful. Because had Eren loved her, decided to be with her, and treated her like she well-deserved, he would have never been part of the picture.

He’d let that thought circle his mind, until he’d finally found it in himself to stop her right there. His hands had grabbed hers, forcing her to let go of him as he’d broken away from the kiss. He’d felt the heat spread across his cheeks, and his breaths stuck in his throat.

And to his surprise, she’d looked as calm and contained as ever, and his frustration had grown unbearable as he’d tried to maintain a controlled, serious voice, scolding her for her unbelievable action. It hadn’t seemed to affect her in any way, though, at least not until he’d mentioned her parents, and her stare had suddenly gone dark.

He hadn’t known about her parents, and so hearing her words had silenced him for good. A rush of regret had made his chest tighten –even now as he thought about it-, silently cursing himself for saying that to her, even when he’d had no awareness of that fact. She’d left the classroom before he could form a proper apology in his head.

 _It wasn’t fair_ , he sighed; _life._

She was heartbroken. The boy she loved was with someone else and that must hurt her. But he didn’t want her to use him as a temporary shelter; a replacement, where she could hide until the storm ended. He didn’t want her to let confusion consume her wholly to the point where she’d just throw herself at anyone she stumbled upon, even if she didn’t want to be with them. Or did she? He wasn’t sure. He wasn’t even sure what he wanted to do with her, what he was supposed to do with all those feelings he bore for her.

There was Jean, he thought, and if she’d truly wanted a replacement for Eren, she could have gone to Jean. Everyone knew the boy was head-over-heels for her, even Levi. He’d satisfy her, and be good to her. He’d be good _for_ her, unlike him. But she chose him instead and it got him wondering—hoping that maybe, in the end, she did have feelings for him too.

It still wouldn’t change much, though. No matter if they both had feelings for one another, it was still wrong. But he could always hope that maybe in a couple of years, when she’d be old enough, they’d have their chance together. He’d wait for her, but would she wait for him? Would _life_ wait for him?

With a sigh, he added Mikasa’s paper to the ones placed on the table. ‘ _A’_ was marked on it, and he reached his hand to grab his cup of tea, sipping from it; _he’d let his mind drift away again_. He placed the cup back down, and proceeded with the few papers left in his hand.

 

 

* * *

The next day was Friday, and Levi had no class with them, which he thought was a good thing, for he’d at least get a chance to spend some time away from her to clear his mind, not that it had ever helped him before, anyway.

He still caught a glimpse of her now and then, walking in the hallways to attend her classes, but she hadn’t glanced at him even once, which should have reassured him, but it had only made him feel troubled. She looked soulless, and he hated to think that he’d hurt her feelings so much. He hated to think that his words were the reason behind the deadpan face she wore the whole day.

And she wasn’t really one to let words hurt her feelings. She wasn’t one to feel hurt at all, unless it concerned her family, and the people she held most dear to her heart, and she couldn’t tell just when Levi had become any of those. She was a mess of sadness and anger, and her frustration with herself only grew more whenever she remembered what she did, whenever she remembered what she told Eren, whenever she remembered that she caused this mess, and she, for once, did not know how to get out of it.

“Mikasa…” Annie called for her opponent’s attention, bouncing the ball against the squeaky, hard floor, “A little shaky today, aren’t we?” she moved swiftly away when Mikasa made a weak move to take the ball from her, and she passed it over to one of her teammates across the court.

They were in the gym, and Mikasa’s team was losing for the first time in so long, and even people like Eren, who were supporting Annie’s team, were surprised to see that. Something was wrong with her, and Eren grimaced as he watched sloppiness wash over her, the ball slipping from her hand before she could touch it, wasting countless of otherwise perfect shots, and ironically ignoring her team members.

Mikasa gave off a dark glare, huffing as she saw the ball being tossed around between the other players. Annie, for some reason, seemed persistent on sticking by her side and keeping her from moving freely, for she kept popping up in front of her whenever she tried to reach out for the ball.

She never really talked to her before, not on a personal level, but she knew they wouldn’t get along. Eren was one reason why.

“It’s a shame.” Annie spoke to her again, seemingly seeking to hit a nerve, “I’d rather lose against you than win because you’re not focusing enough…”

“Annie…” Mikasa’s arms dropped to her sides as she eyed the girl with grim eyes, “When was it again that you _lost_ against _me_?” _You got Eren, didn’t you?_ She finished in her head.

“Hm?” Annie was confused, and before she could respond to that, a loud whistling sound interrupted the conversation.

“Alright, girls! Time’s up!” Hanji clapped her hands, dropping the whistle out of her mouth, “That’s enough for today. You did well.”

Annie then looked at Hanji before she brushed her hair behind her ear and turned to leave, dropping the conversation right away.

“Go get a shower and get changed!” Hanji kept on addressing the girls as she watched some of them stretch, others fall to their knees to rest, “Mikasa, dear, lacking some energy today, I see?” she then approached the girl with furrowed brows.

Mikasa turned to her teacher and sighed, “Sorry, I wasn’t…” her attention seemed to avert to something else as her eyes stared to the distance behind Hanji, but she quickly focused her eyes back on her teacher to finish, “I didn’t sleep well.”

“That’s alright, dear!” Hanji gave the girl a quick pat on the shoulder as she walked past her. “Make sure to get enough sleep next time.”

As soon as the woman left, Mikasa’s eyes seemed to drift back to the distance again, only she was staring at an empty doorway. _She could swear she saw him there just a second ago_.

“Annie!” Eren walked into the court, stepping towards Annie, and carelessly pulling her in for a quick kiss. “That was a good game, huh?”

She kissed him back, though had to helplessly restrain the strong urge to punch him when hearing his next statement. “You’re kidding, right?!” she scoffed.

“Ah, well!” he let out a sorry sigh and threw a quick glance at Mikasa. She looked tragically miserable, he thought. “You did your best and won. That’s what matters.” His eyes met Annie’s again.

“I don’t know why you and your adoptive sister think winning is all it’s about…” Annie’s pleasingly blue eyes rolled at his dull words, “But I’m sure it’s a stupid-ass reason.”

Eren’s lips pressed together in a thin line, eyeing her sharply, though he was far from feeling offended by any insult she’d shoot at him. His lips parted again to let out a soft sigh, “You have no classes after this, right?” he asked a little urgently, “Maybe we can go have brunch outside?”

She nodded after several moments of exchanging silent gazes, and even if her uninterested eyes didn’t speak of it, excitement tickled her insides cruelly, giving her a fluffy feeling in the stomach. “I need to take a shower first.”

“That’s okay. I’ll wait!” he spoke, a hand reaching to her hair, giving it a gentle ruffle before caressing her cheek tenderly and leaning down to press a kiss to her yieldingly soft lips.

Annie impotently gave in to the smoothness of his touch, closed her eyes when his lips joined hers, allowed herself to delight in the ardent kiss, and a hint of a smile melted in between. She felt his hand leave her cheek, abandoning ghostly warmth that spread across her face when his fingers trailed down her bare arm, sliding behind her back to hold her close to his body.

Her breathing hitched as she broke away from the kiss, an annoying blush obdurately shading her cheeks, and she gave him a threateningly pointed look. “Are you trying to make me punch you again?”

“Maybe…” he teased, and pressed his forehead to hers, a light smirk lingering between his lips, “Cause then I might get to hold you in my arms again…”

Annie rolled her eyes at him again, “Flirting makes you sound dumb.” She pushed away from him and walked, headed to the locker room. She let a smile curl the corners of her lips up once denying him the honor of seeing her face, but she felt him wrap a firm arm around her waist from behind, his fingers smoothing over the exposed skin of her stomach as he pressed her back to his front.

“At least give me some credits for trying…” he mumbled sweetly close to her ear.

Annie felt a slight shiver spread through her body at the feel of his breath against her skin. She didn’t really mind being in his arms, not at all. She actually loved it, wouldn’t admit it to him, but she knew that deep down he secretly knew it too. However she didn’t understand why he was getting all affectionate with her so suddenly, holding her so possessively, at least not until her eyes fell upon the figure standing across from them; Armin.

And she didn’t know why she felt uncomfortable when his eyes met hers, as if he caught her committing a crime. His mere stare showered her in guilt and she instantly elbowed Eren in the stomach, forcing him away from her.

Eren stumbled back, holding his stomach tightly as he balanced himself. His jaw clenched, “Could you maybe make an exception for your boyfriend and use less force when hitting him than when you’re hitting someone else?”

“You don’t get any privileges from dating me.” She huffed with crossed arms, eyeing him dangerously from over her shoulders, “I’m all sweaty and sticky. You really don’t want to hold me now.” She justified as she started to step away, “I’ll take a shower and meet you, alright?” her eyes briefly traveled back to Armin, and she saw him headed to Mikasa.

“Okay, see you!” Eren nodded, rubbing his stomach a little, glaring when seeing her look in Armin’s direction, and soon he turned to face his friend who was standing with Mikasa.

“Eren!” Armin waved at him to come with a bright smile.

With a sigh, Eren walked over to them, “Hey, Mikasa!” he greeted, giving her a suspicious eye, “What the hell happened back there? You looked as if you never touched a ball before.”

“Eren!” Armin sneaked a glare at him, as if indirectly telling him he knew the reason, “I was telling Mikasa about our plans for the weekend.”

 _Their plans for the weekend?_ Eren’s brow furrowed for a brief moment, and relaxed once he remembered. Yes, they’d agreed to take Mikasa out somewhere to cheer her up since her parents’ anniversary was approaching, and suddenly he understood what could possibly be the reason behind her shaky performance today. “Right, yes!” he nodded, but suddenly realized something else, and he sounded uncertain, “Actually…”

Armin’s face went blank. Why did he feel like Eren was about to cancel their plans?

“I can’t go out with you guys…” he said apologetically, “I told Annie I’d go out with her.”

Mikasa glanced at him with as less emotion as one could possibly possess. “That’s okay. I didn’t really want to go out anyway.”

“Don’t say that!” Armin cut her off, turning to face Eren next, “Why don’t you cancel your plans with Annie? I’m sure she’ll understand and won’t get upset if you hung out with us instead. We’re your friends…”

“Armin!” Mikasa shook her head, “He doesn’t have to cancel his plans with her for me. We can still go out, just the two of us.”

“Yes but… He promised he’d come with us…” Armin insisted, “Eren, come on, man. You can’t ditch us like that. I understand, you have a girlfriend now, but when did that mean you no longer had time for us?”

“You tell me that, Armin.” Eren glowered down at the boy skeptically, “When did my relationship with Annie become a threat to our friendship?”

Armin’s blue eyes opened slightly wider, blinking at the dubious query. His expression broke into a frown, as he lowered his head and dug into the ground with his gaze. “Forget it.”

“Stop it, you two.” Mikasa’s hands shook the boys by their shoulders, “There’s no need to argue over this. We’ll still have plenty of chances to go out together.”

“Yeah, sorry…” Armin looked up with a repentant smile, “It’s just that it’s been a while since we hung out together and… I miss you guys.”

Both Mikasa and Eren looked awfully guilty. He was right; Eren had been busy going out with Annie, and Mikasa hadn’t been in the mood to hang out much, for she seemed to fish for every chance of solitude she’d get.

Armin’s statement was enough to erase the tension that built up moments ago, and Eren’s eyes grew big with keenness and warmth. A loving smile broke the thin, straight line between his lips, his hand holding Armin’s shoulder reassuringly, “Alright, next week, I promise we’ll go out, all three of us.”

Armin’s gloominess got swept away upon hearing the sincerity in Eren’s words, and he looked up at him with a face as bright as sunlight.

“We’re going to have fun, like we always do, yeah?” Eren stretched furthermore, his eyes glittering with pride when a smile finally peeked into the boy’s cheeks.

“Yeah, alright!” Armin gave a buoyant nod, “I’m sorry if I sounded pushy. I just don’t want us to be too occupied with life and no longer have time for each other.”

“That won’t happen!” Eren avowed with poise.

And Mikasa felt as if she turned invisible as she watched the boys exchange promises and affection through fond gazes and compassionate words, and in that moment she realized; their lives wouldn’t have been any different had she never been part of them.

“I have to go take a quick shower. I’ll catch up with you later.” She ruined the intimacy of the moment with her gelid voice, silently backing away.

Armin blinked a couple of times at her, but nodded, and so did Eren. “Okay!” he gave a quick wave, and watched her leave the gym, silence falling upon them once again. “Say, Eren…” Armin spoke once Mikasa was gone, “Did Mikasa tell you something recently?”

“Something?” Eren cocked a brow questioningly, “Like… what?”

“Like why she’s been looking so lost for the past few days?” Armin clarified, “I saw her yesterday after lunch break and she looked really upset over something, and I don’t recall her being so at all when we got to school.” He paused, noticing Eren’s countenance unfold with every word he spoke before he continued, “I got the impression that you knew what was up with her.” He gave him a serious look as he asked, “Do you?”

Eren gulped. Oh, yes he knew, and he wondered whether Armin could read through his thoughts at that moment. The little bastard had to be so smart, didn’t he? He shook his head nonetheless, “I don’t. Maybe you should ask her.” He claimed with a nonchalant shrug of his shoulders, “I didn’t notice anything wrong with her. You’re the one who’s always noticing things.”

“Oh?” Armin raised a brow, unconvinced, “That’s weird. It seems lately I’ve been assuming many wrong things about you two. It’s almost as if I hadn’t known you for years.”

Eren’s eyes twitched nervously at Armin’s shifty statement, but decided to drop the topic instantly before he’d end up telling him the secret he’d succeeded to keep all this long. “I’m… I’ll go wait for Annie outside. See you!”

Armin wore a disappointed look, watching his friend walk away. “Eren!” he called for him, and waited for the boy to turn to him before he added, “Your ears were red…” he noted.

Eren’s lips parted slightly at his friend’s sharp remark, but he merely pressed them back together tightly in a nervous smile, rubbed the back of his head as he waved goodbye, walking off.

Armin no longer doubted it; Eren _knew_ something.

_To be continued._

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've been working on this fanfic for weeks and as of right now I have up to chapter eight drafted. I've struggled so much with editing this chapter, originally because it had 9k+ words, and at some point in the process I got so overwhelmed and could no longer focus on editing, and so even though I didn't want to do it, I ended up cutting this chapter. On the bright side, that gave me an extra chapter drafted, but as a result, this chapter ended up with 5k+ words left. I thought about it and saw that I should probably stick to short chapters, because I know not everyone has time to read longer ones, especially with school and all that, and also because I don't want to get overwhelmed when trying to get an update ready.
> 
> I can't promise you that I'll keep updating this fanfic regularly, since I'm going back to uni soon myself, but since I already saved chapter drafts, I'll make sure to work on editing those on my free time and post them when possible.
> 
> I stated this in the previous chapter, but I'm going to say it again; I'll be including more of EreAni in this fanfic as well as other ships, solely because I'm a multi-shipper and I truly love every single one of these characters and I feel like they deserve at least a mention here and there. Don't worry, though. I started this as a RivaMika and EreAni fanfic, and I shall stay true to that!
> 
> I apologize if this chapter felt a little slow-paced. Since I had to cut it, it took out some interesting events, which you'll see in the next chapter, anyway.
> 
> Thanks again for reading my fanfic, a review is much appreciated! I hope everyone is having a good day/afternoon/evening wherever you are!


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